Updating

i've started updating/fleshing out my TES Fest notes.... i'll try to finish them up tomorrow. i can't believe it's been a week!

Work

Ahh, there's nothing better than having your boss come back from a 10 day vacation ,when he's left you in charge, and having your co-workers tell him what a great job you've done! Fabulous! That made me feel really great!
Then i got a call from my big pharmaceutical client and they reamed me out for a minor mistake that i made. Oops! Nothing like a little shot of humility to smooth out a slave's ego....

4th of July

i was so hoping to get to relax on Tuesday and recover from the weekend. We ended up being as busy as every, returning phone calls, answering emails and putting together the dollar amounts for the auction basket for the Contest. i knew that we had a huge pile of donations and things that the Household had assembled - but i had no idea what the value was. *clears her throat* i am VERY pleased! We've got some very generous friends in this Community!

All i can say is for the people that read this blog, bring your money for the auction!
Yes - there's a weekend sailing trip on the coast of Maine with a fabulous M/s couple, with Amtrak tickets to get you there. Anyone up for some play on a yacht? Make Your slave swab the decks? Walk the plank? :-) The Cane Mutiny? This trip sounds so hot that i want to bid on it!

We're still waiting on a few items that were promised and a few that we haven't been able to pick up yet. That stuff should be done this coming weekend. A few people are bringing their donations to the event. (some HOT original art work!) This is so exciting! It's truly heartening to me to see and feel so much support.

Whenever i start to get worried about the little things that slaves worry about, i try to remember how much love i'm getting from not just my Master but from those around me and that, win or lose - there will be a lot of supportive arms to catch me when i collapse at the end of the contest! ;-)
(Hopefully some of those arms will be wielding pokey things and canes in my direction...)
The Contest countdown continues.....

TES Fest Monday - Last Day....

OK, really - no sleep last night. At all! :-) but i mean that in a good way....

• Dogs running wild - poor puppies are so mad from being in lock down and even when we are home, they've been kept out of the living room so they aren't pouncing on sleeping guests. There's going to be hell to pay when we are finally really home!
  
• TES BBQ - We got to enjoy the bbq. Man was it hot out there! The food was pretty good, but once again: good conversation with friends made it better. i got to speak more to Firefly (i love him!) and Master Jack, always a pleasure to spend time with.
  
• Pony Show - instead of classes, we went to the Pony show! YAY! Ponies! That was fun.
  
• Hanging with friends - more hanging with friends. i really felt like this was almost a vacation, my last hurrah before throwing myself in to the contest preparation frenzy.
  
• A phone call from my past! - i headed in to the bathroom before we were going to gather our class notes and collect ourselves. *ring* it's my cell phone. Who the hell could be calling me? It was my friend Jack, the long lost voice from the past. What an absolute heart stopper it was to hear from Him. Once again, conversation picked up where we left off and He said exactly what i needed to hear. After we spoke briefly and He promised that yes, it was ok for me to call Him anytime i needed help - He said two magic words (which i will not reveal here or probably ever, they're the same ones that Sir uses on me to settle me down and i never told Him about that!) and said good bye. i hung up and burst in to tears in the middle of the parking lot. i was bawling my eyes out, but i felt great. Some people are just such magic!
  
• Some poking of my thigh bruises.... so after i bawled my eyes out i settled down and got my thigh bruises poked by someone. Now i'm really feeling great! :-)
  
• Some flirting with someone else....Went inside to vending and got some awesome bear hugs and some flirting done. my day is just getting better and better.
  
• Our class on Worthy Mastery/Worthy slavery - Well, by 5pm on last day, there's not a lot of wide awake people left. But we had about 10 high quality people in the room, asking great questions and had a very interactive class. i know i certainly ended up be blown away by how well it went.
  
• Great conversation afterwards - met 2 local people and man oh, man - do i love those 2 guys from Texas! - We ended up hanging around for about a half an hour after the class talking with the 2 guys from Texas, who i am madly in love with, and two local people who we are planning on having dinner with after the contest.
  
• Home - clean up, dogs gone wild and happy! - i drove home alone, cranked the stereo (world/inferno again) and drove f*a*s*t, elated, exhilarated and so happy to be home. We three of us, cleaned up the house, played with the pups and ate all the leftovers from Thursday night.
  
• and then...... a few hours later, off to an exhausted and well deserved dreamless sleep.
  

TES Fest Sunday

• What day is it????: woke up with no idea what day it was... still slightly damp and really sore! But a good sore, in all the right places. Plus, why didn't anyone tell me that Tops worked so darn hard? :-)
  
• Sir Stephen & slave catherine's class: Very well attended and Interesting. i don't get to see them present often enough. That's got to change. i love that slave catherine's confidence in public speaking is just through the roof!
  
• Lunch snafu: Far too much confusion on where to eat.....
  
• Our class & schedule confusion: HSL's class on How we changed from Vanilla to M/s - listed in wrong place.. so turn out was small but it was great. Lots of good questions.
  
• Dinner at Java Moon! (Yummy!): i am so diggin' on this place. There's another one near Sir's house so i will be going back again. Comfort food (chicken pot pie and smashed potatoes) totally hit the spot.
  
• Thunder storm & cool lightning: Huge storm on the way there and back. i saw lightning that was sort of circular, like a lasso. That was amazing.
  
• my turn for an ass kicking (ok, thigh caning): back to the dungeon for a thigh caning scene that i requested. stripped to jock, boots and a white tank top. Tied to chair, shirt cut off of me, me resisting all the way. Kicking until my legs were tied to the chair. Amazing how accurately i can spit even with a bone gag in my mouth.... Yum, yum yum...
  
• sadly, not so much flirting today! just a little.... barely enough!
  
• Home
• No sleep..... for many reasons..... many, many reasons....... :-)

Oh - and i forgot, this belongs on Saturday's post - amazing and generous contest support from a favorite vendor! Huzzah! i can't give details until it's firmed up but it looks like rather than a physical donation, we might be getting a % of sales at the M/s Conference for the travel fund!

TES Fest Saturday

• no sleep.....So really, i didn't sleep at all. Just layed there staring at the ceiling. It happens more than i like. But, no reat for the wicked. Up early, dogs crated and off to the Fest for an early morning class.
  
• adversarial play class: Sir and sparky's class. After their...scene? at South Plains, so many people were asking "what the hell was that? A fight? Are you His slave? Do you let Your boy talk to you like that? So many misconceptions on what their relationship was/is and what the play was about. It needed a class to explain it. LOL, standing room only and in fact, some of the people who witnessed it there in Dallas were there for the class! Hot! Lots of explanation, then an explosive 20 minute demo. Two goin shots to Sir, one, two, three rug burns for sparky. Fun. The best thing was so many people coming up throughout the whole weekend telling them "we went back to the hotel and re-enacted your class, we had a blast, thank you" that's very gratifying! Build a better pervert, indeed!
  
• lunch on the run... which building are the classes in? at this point, i can't even remember what we did for lunch....and we could figure out which building the next class was in! Oy
  
• 2 great Lady Catherine classes - One on super deluxe piercing and one on the 3 C's. Both great - i'm not a big fan of piercing. Having an illness that required a lot of blood tests and transfusions and my permanant i.v. port then that freakin' awful and ineffective (for me) WhinRHo chemo stuff - i just am not a big needle girl. HOWEVER - i am working to reclaim that for myself. SO as hard as the class was for me to watch, its part of the work that i need to do to free myself from my medical fears.
  
• quick dinner - unremarkable.
  
• flirting continues.....Good Goddess, if there was any doubt in my mine that i'm a sexual being and basically a slut for the right guy, that doubt has been removed from my mind.
  

• and some hot sweat licking.... damn. That guy is just too hot for my own good. :-)

• the take-down of Sir vrs. sparky and me....what happened? You'll have to check back for details! : Yes, that's right. sparky and i have been planning this for about a month. We let the Man think He was going to beat the hell out of sparky but, well - He hinted that He wanted it... we took a chance and He loved it. Tied up with His own belt, theatened with a stun gun, (He's quite a fighter, my Master is) beaten using His own techniques. Finally beggin to be put in the sling. :-) i went around begging some lube (thank to B & V for locating it for me!) A Man in a sling for the first time is a happy Man! That's my story and i'm stickin' to it! Who knew i could Top? me. i knew.... :-)
  

Home. Hot. Sex. All members of HSL satisfied and sleep deprived. and grinning like a bunch of idiots. The bed sheets are in the wash and all is well.....
headed to the shower and ready for round 3......

TES FEST FRIDAY

i'll be filling this in when i am coherent - probably on Wednesday. But before i forget my notes:

• work: it was awful getting up for work today, knowing that Sir and sparky and our guests were going to TES Fest without me. Luckily, it was really slow and we managed to get all our orders out the door by 3pm - by 3:15 i was parked and ready to rock! Sir greeted me with a huge hug in the parking lot. i love being greeted by that Man - He knows how to make a girl feel wanted! :-) Registration was a snap - very well organized and within a few minutes i was....
  
• bootblacking! OK, i was not bootblacking, but i was the recipiant of a wonderful bootblacking experience by one of our houseguests. She did a great job her 1st time out in a public setting.
  
• old friends new friends: It was great just chilling out by registration and seeing old friends, both local and not so local, as well as reconnecting with new friends. Zoinks! Such hotness! We also ran into a friend of Mistress Blair's that we haven't seen in a couple of years - that boy has grown into a vision of super cute hotness. So innocent looking but yet NOT! :-)
  
• dinner: at a local place where Sir used to eat lunch every week. They (the cute girls behind the counter) were happy to see Him. The food was ok, hanging with friends made it better.
• a great auction! i was looking so forward to bidding on someone - but with the opening bid i was blown completely out of the water. Oh, well. It worked out for the best. He went for a vast amount of money and i'm sure he got a great experience out of it as well. *snicker*
  
• a great beating with eye candy to boot! Off to the dungeon to get flogged, punched and kicked. As Sir was getting me situated, a vision of hotness set up a station directly in my eye shot.... sigh! So i get to be beaten by my super hot Master while looking at another hot guy beat a hot girl? It's just not fair the things i have to suffer though. *sniff* After some teasing back and forth between the two Sadists, Sir got down to business and i settled down to get a much needed thrashing. Then some delightful aftercare - Sir rubbed my hands and shoulders while sparky did my boots! That was great, thanks guys!
  
• home - dog pee on my blankets - again! Back home... the dogs must have been left unattended before they were crated because someone pee'd on my pillow and blankets. i got out a spare pillow (lumpy!) and a blanket and settled in to sleep on the floor as usual.
  
• no sleep........ and the Fest continues: not much sleep, too hyped up and no "release" for me....
  

the ITP anniversary

This weekend marks the anniversary of the i was first diagnosed with ITP - the weird red marks all over my body, the extreme bruising for no reason. The doctor fluffing it off with - "oh, just take some vitamin c, you'll be fine. ok, i'll do a blood test, if you insist. " The crazy phone call the next day to "get my ass in the hospital, now. Don't even go home to get clothes. Just go NOW."

i was so scared, i actually stopped for a cup of really good coffee on the way, figuring if i was about to get a death sentence, i'd do it with one of my pleasures in hand. Sir was SO afraid for me. i remember hearing Him and the Dr. whispering in the hallway about LEUKEMIA. WHAT!!!??? The extremely painful bone marrow biopsy (if anyone wants to see my tiny scar - just ask. i just realized this week that it was still visable) the awful platelet transfusion, which came after a long and scary wait because blood was in short supply over a holiday weekend..... watching fireworks out of my hospital window, hooked up to an i.v. - that was freakin' sad. (oh, not to mention that i started leaking spinal fluid from the biopsy and got really sick from that! Oy!) i wasn't sure that the diagnosis that i got was any better than leukemia, since i'd never heard of the disease before - scary stuff.

SO, here i am many drug therapies and 3 surgeries later. My Hemotologist gave me clearance to go forth and do what ever it is that i do (i was pretty out with him as a pervert) my counts are stable and i feel great. What a long strange trip it's been. If it hadn't been for me getting sick - i wouldn't have petitioned to be Sir's slave Interesting, huh?

i am a lucky, healthy girl!

Pre-TES FEST PARTY!

whoo hoo! Perverts gathering in their masses!
We'll have a house full o' people tonight, (ok, not FULL but 2 extra= 5 total) i am excited. i'm gonna rush home and whip up some:
Baked Ziti, salad, garlic bread, meatballs & sauce and a vietnamese noodle salad for the vegans in the crowd. (ok, i'm not a vegan - i'd just rather eat a cool salad when it's this humid out)

i'm off to lunch and when i return it'll be time for yet another party - ice cream cake farewell party for a retiring co-worker. Huzzah! Huzzah for ice cream cake!

Contact

What a crap week of work! Really! my boss hasn't checked in even once - which i guess is good because he trusts me to run the place without him. Or is it because he knows i'd yell at him about how under staffed we are? Who knows. i'd better get some swag from Italy or i'm going to be really annoyed.

i just mailed a letter to a dear old friend that i lost contact with. He has a way of settling me down with His emails but i think He's gone offline.... UGH! So i sent a real paper letter with a  stamp! i hope He replies. i hope the reason He fell out of contact isn't that His wife didn't like me speaking to Him. Or worse yet, that He really just doesn't want to speak to me!   i really want His opinions on some of the contest stuff, mostly with the emotional crap that i'm worrying about. He generally just tells me to shut up and stop being a goof. Doesn't put up with my nonsense - kind of a verbal face slapping on a hysterical person.  He's a good hearted man who stood by me (along with Sir) while i was going thru all my family's angst  and the family court abuse case and alot of other teen age drama. A good guy, that one.

boo boo

OK, so my pinkie is not broke, just squashed but my nail was ripped off and that really still hurts a lot! i hate non-consensual pain!

Spent many hours cleaning the house with Sir. It probably would have gone faster if the dogs didn't need to help. Every time we'd sweep up a pile of dust, they'd have to rummage thru it and look for goodies..... But the house looks great now. i love cleaning with my Master - we're crankin' tunes, i strip down and scrub the house while i'm shakin' my booty!

There's really only 2 days of work left until the weekend. i just have to get past tomorrow and Thursday. For Friday, i suggested to the warehouse manager that she get all the UPS & Fedex pickups as early as possible so we can blowout of there. Not surprisingly, she agreed. (i love being in charge sometimes.) i'm pretty well "out" with her, she knows i'm in to leather, etc. She also knows that TES Fest is this weekend and why i want to get there ASAP. She knows i'm up to no good this weekend! :-)

i'm going to go collapse and enjoy the sparkling house and contemplate a devious take down scene for the weekend. i need to put my head together with my co-conspirator and figure out some logistics..... be careful what You hint around about - You just might get it!

nothing like....

There's nothing like returning to work after a fantastic weekend and having a real turd of a day! At least i had the pleasure of being uncomfortable where ever i sat down AND i kept banging my bruised thigh on my desk. Ah, the gift that keeps on giving! *grin*

i just realized that the dead line for ordering Sir's work anniversary gift was closing in today - He handed me the catalog a few weeks ago and said "hey,  you can pick out anything you like from this catalog, the company's giving me a 10 year anniversary gift... by the way, I like the smoker/grill" So i just ordered  it up. Should be here in a few weeks. i am a total BBQ fanatic, when i have enough time to do it right.  48 hour marinades, 24 hour dry rubs on the ribs. Oh, yeah! (ok, so i don't eat red meat but i can live vicariously) i've only gotten to grill once this year and it wasn't so good. i have a feeling that that might have been the last time for this summer since we're going to be so darn busy!

ok, lilu just jumped on me, ripped off my pinkie nail and i think she broke my pinkie. signing off now......

Pride

And then it rained again! Sunday, up early.... quick breakfast and then i was FINALLY allowed to take a shower. Yeah, i needed that! :-) Quick ride in to the city...great lunch-freshly made potato chips with my sandwich, yum! (that's what the hip kids say now a days)

Tons of fun under the grey skies. A bit of play with my new playmate - i do like single tails, i do, i do! i like my life! i am a very, very lucky girl! (oink!)

It took forever to figure out where to get the train back to the car, but the trip home was fast. Great conversation on the Household, expectations, wishes.... Yeah, all great stuff. i repeat - i am a very, very lucky girl.
A hot bath, foot massages all around and off to bed soon. i'm gonna sleep like a happy piglet. 

Rainy days and Saturdays get me....

OK, So little Miss me - afraid to travel alone.... Headed out in the monsoon on Saturday a.m. Got to the ferry after much delay and drenching. Wow, did they ever change the ferry terminal since i was last there. Mom's ashes in hand, i stood outside and waited for the right moment. A lack of cops and onlookers, plus i really wanted to let her go when we passed the Statue of Liberty - since she' s the closest thing we've got to a Goddess in the harbor. Here's a picture of the salt shaker that my sister put my share of my Mom's ashes in. Yes, it's got a picture of a cock on it. (ok, Rooster if you insist)
i gave it some thought, i wished we'd gotten along. i wish her life wasn't so damn hard for her. i wish my father wasn't such a bastard to her. But i'm grateful that she made me the person that i am - a damn strong and damn capable woman. And then i let her go ..... Plop. She floated until that little shaker was out of sight. i feel much lighter now. She was a heavy burden to carry.

Got in to NYC, met up with a new friend and a newer friend. Got a great lunch, learned some stuff about my self that i already suspected and generally surprised myself. Several great hours later, i was in a cab and then back on the ferry - grinning like an idiot. Thank Goddess they sell orange juice on the ferry!

i drove home and went past the house where i grew up - the Pine trees that were planted when i was born are literally over the rooftop. Weird. Cool. The Japanese Maple that my mother grew from a seed that she brought with her when she moved here is just gigantic. That made me 15 minutes later than i should have been home, but all was forgiven. i came in to the house to see two fabulously happy people who greeted me with my favorite treat from Rita's (vanilla custard and mango Italian ice!) and a welcome home note on the door. The intrepid traveler returns!

i like rainy Saturdays. Can't wait for my next voyage.

The crack of Morning

Crunch Crunch *opens one eye* What's that noise? .... silence.....

Crunch Crunch *opens one eye* TAYBOR!!!!!!

Taybor stole Kyra out of my bed and ate one of her eyes. (Kyra, which means "ladylike" in greek is my stuffed rhino) The litle girl in me is severly traumatized! The eye is gone, no hope of reattachement. i'll have to make her an eye patch. Very sad and very angry. Sir just got Kyra for me a few weeks ago when i was really sad and having a tough time.

Plus, someone pee'd on my blanket again! Damn it! i think i'm going to rig up something with Sir's Folsom box that shock the pee-er when they do that. There's got to be a way.

Ok, gruel for breakfast and off to the gym... then off to ride the SI ferry and when... who knows? :-)

What to do?

Still trying to put together my "slave barb does NYC alone" day for Saturday. i'm not happy with any of the things that i've selected. The Circle Line? The Bodies exhibit at South Street Seaport?

Maybe just stomp around my old digs on SI, visit my old High School wander the grounds of Snug Harbor where i used to hang with my best buds (friends forever, we'll never be apart... haven't seen nor heard from in ..oh, 20+ years) But the thought of that is just too bitter.

Back when my mother died (Sept 1999) i didn't go to see her in the hospital. That we had a hatred filled relationship is an understatement, but i loved her like... a mother. She truly was the strongest woman physically and emotionally (by that i mean she was like a volcano of rage) My little sister and older brother had her cremated. My sister in a fit of perversity, split the ashes into my mom's salt & pepper shaker collection and distributed it to the siblings - since we all hated each other and couldn't/wouldn't share custody of her. i didn't want this piece of my dead mother. What the hell was i going to do with it? i've been trying to figure out how to get rid of it without being disrespectful, maybe i'll give her to the NY Harbor... there's along story about why i'd leave her in that particular place. It seems fitting to do it but i'm not explaining that here. Now.

Yes, perhaps releasing my mother to the deep blue to swim with the fishies, ride the ferry, hike up to the Seaport and then look at a bunch of dead bodies. How very Goth of me. :-)
Sounds like a plan to me!

testing and boots

i am testing out a new Firefox extention so i can blog from my browser window... should lead to more spontaneous blogging from work - if it works!

Sir just had me look up some pricing at work on a pair of boots. Boot Whore that He is, He needs something else for work.
He already has these
and these:

and these:

But now He needs these:

i have such a great job - Boots are just a side business here, it's a good thing they don't actually stock all of these in our warehouse or i'd really get nothing done. It was bad enough when we had one pallet of Corc's come and i was outside sniffing the cartons. So many boots.....*shiver*

So much for Yoga

Yes, Yes.... we started out having a discussion and ended up being over come on the sofa - so to speak. i do so love when Sir takes me shopping at Babeland. Plus some other stuff came in the mail today that apparently got Him all hot and bothered. :-)

So i made us late for Yoga and before we knew it, it was 8:30. (Yoga started at 8)

What a way to celebrate the Solstice! Happy Solstice to All!

Whacking off

Ok, so i'm enjoying the early morning wake up i've been trying to do. i've been about 60% successful in getting up when Sir does. i wasn't in the head space to follow through for part of last week, but today i was up early. Got a hot porno photo from Sir to my cell phone, which lead to hot phone sex with me, Sir and my Hitachi.... And then - Lilu hopped up on the bed and pee'd all over the blankets. Talk about a buzz kill (pun intended)
So, instead of the highly productive morning i was anticipating - i was washing the sheets and blankets for Sir's bed. Grumble. Maybe Lilu's thinking - "OH, barb's having sex by herself, usually the big dude pees on her... Maybe i need to help out here." Perhaps she really was trying to be a helpful dog. She really did look contrite - even as she was doing it. Sigh.

Off to Yoga tonight. Yay! i need it bad, my hips are all out of whack from standing so long this weekend. Tomorrow is dinner in the park and then i get to do Sir's boots - i hope the weather holds out and we don't have one of those typical NJ summer thunder storms at sunset. i really want to do His boots outside. :-)

Still putting together my itinerary for my solo day in the city on Saturday. slave barb does Manhattan - maybe i'll run in to some charming person or people to keep me entertained. :-)

Leather Pride Weekend

This weekend some one who i didn't know was a reader of mine commented that i don't journal often enough! Well, i'll try to do better - You know who you are! (if my faithful readers would leave a comment now and then, maybe i'd be more inspired...)

It was a really tough week for me leading up to LP. Lots of emotional stuff to work though. i'm proud to say the HSL is a bunch of tough mother fuckers, willing to do the hard work and dig deep. i'm proud of us all!

When we left for LPN, my heart just wasn't in it, but i ended up having a decent time at LPN and a blast at Folsom. On Monday Sir took me to Gunnison Beach where i had a great naked time and got sun burn in places that i never have before! After going there, i can't understand why anyone WOULDN'T want to go there - so much more comfortable and no sand chafing in the swimsuit. A perfect relaxing day - except for the biting flies (which bit me in places i've never had bites before!) i hope we can go back maybe in September, before it gets cold out but after the crowds of people think beach season is over.

Over all wrap up for the week - Hard work, Lots of flirting with someone :-) Hot leather Men and Women and Girls and Boys, a little sunburn, a few bug bites, some major relaxation and Oh, yes, a HUGE weight lifted of my shoulders. i am a lucky girl!