Christmas Mayhem

So, by 9:00 p.m. yesterday, it looked like an elf threw up in the house. Paper and boxes, ribbons and tags, instruction manuals and candy - everywhere!

Master and i had an amazing 4 days together. We spent Solstice in the City with old friends and my new friend *grin* and Christmas Eve with His family. Christmas day was spent with The Aunt.

i am sad to say that by about 4 in the afternoon, i'd had enough and started to get cranky. She's become such a... well, cranky old lady. :-) Whenever she'd give the Right Wing, just-mild-enough-to-get-away-with-but-still-slightly-racist comment - it was just driving me bananas! i was also getting annoyed (and this is *my* problem, not hers!) by how she's losing her mental acuity. i know that i'm expressing my worry about her by being annoyed - that doesn't make it ok for me to do, i'm just acknowledging that i understand what my issue is. No one enjoys watching a loved one begin to decline.

She had a lot of fun with our crazy dogs. They love going over there and tearing around the house. LiLu loves having someone else to lick and bother. Taybor gets good experience being around other people, since he's very timid for such a big dog.

So, the gifts.... The Aunt gave me a wide assortment of Art tools which i asked for. i was shocked to see a bunch of Master's late Mother's Art tools in the box. i never got to meet her, she died long before i met Master but she was an amazing Artist and also a writer. To be entrusted with her tools was a huge honor for me.

i am always bowled over by the attention that Master pays to what i'm saying through out the year. i'll mention something in April and come Christmas, it's in my stocking or under the tree. i love a Man that pays attention - that, my friends, is a sexy thing! :-) Goodness!

i got Master a sling and frame from the Leatherman. Yup, it really does assemble in 5 minutes. Yup, it's sturdy. Yup, it's broken in. Yup, it's going to remain assembled in the living room until after New Year's Eve! The house reeks of leather and leather sex.

And to wrap up my evening, i'd like to state for the record again: Yes, the inventor of the telephone was a genius who has brought great pleasure and satisfaction to my life, as of late. i'd also like to whine that i do not enjoy the foibles of the modern cell phone service, what with all the static and dropped calls. Having a conversation of a somewhat intimate nature get disconnected 6 times is frustrating - and not in that sexy "well, you'll just have to wait for it" deep voice kind of way. *sigh* Honestly, sometimes a carrier pigeon or telegraph seems like it would be more efficient. (Not that ".-- .... .- - / .- .-. . / -.-- --- ..- / .-- . .- .-. .. -. --. ..--.. " is really all that stimulating.) (yeah, leave me a comment and i'll give you the translation for that, if you dare!)

Happy Solstice to all!

i hope everyone had as fantastic a day
as i did. Saturday Master and i both slept in a bit, good way to kick
off a long weekend if you ask me. Plus, i was allowed to sleep in His
bed by both Him and the dogs. The canine duo cooperated with me and
made a little space for my flannel clad butt. Nice!

Then i scooted off to the kitchen to bake some chocolate drop
shortbread cookies to take with me in to the City tonight. Yes, elf
slave barb needed to do a goofy cookie run! :-) Next thing we knew it
was time to get dressed and head out to Master Jack's presentation for
TES. It took the usual 25 minutes to get to the Lincoln tunnel and
then.... over 2 hours to get in to the City and get parked! Oye! We we
running so late... or so we thought. Turns out Master Jack hit the same
traffic and HE was running late too. TES thoughtfully provided pizza
and soda while we waited, so there was a fun party atmosphere about the
whole thing. The presentation was great, the handout was, as usual,
outstanding and very useful. Lots of good tips for both beginners and
more experienced people.

After the presentation i took Master out for a Solstice
dinner at VNYL. That was a fun restaurant, except Master made me have
the Whitney Houston menu. Ick! Dinner was great, Purple Rain martinis
are delish! (pricey but tasty) i look forward to going there again when
i'm not wearing a corset so i can try some of the appetizers! :-)

We had a leisurely walk over to the Eagle, enjoyed the sights
of the city, all the holiday lights, the smell of the Christmas trees
being sold on the street, people bustling around with their last minute
errands. We spent a few hours chilling at the Eagle and then i got to make
my cookie drop! You know, i am a REALLY lucky girl. i'd also like to
point out that i don't need no stinkin' mistletoe to get what i want
need. Yes, i am lucky! :-)



Traffic was blessedly light and we made it home quickly. A few antics
and we were off to bed. Well, Master was off to bed. i was off to
pacing around the house. Made a call, had some great but all too brief
conversation and then i was finally able to fall asleep. (i guess
sometimes i just need to be tucked in! *grin* )



Yes, Happy Solstice!

Shred Your Bad Memories of 2007Shred Your Bad Memories of 2007

This sounds like fun: anyone got anyone or anything they want to shred? i know i have a few things/people that i'd like to dump in Times Square! Please share your comments!

Shred Your Bad Memories of 2007


NEW YORK (AP) -- In the spirit of starting anew, a business group and the city's sanitation department are inviting New Yorkers to shred their bad memories of 2007.

Everything from photos of ex-lovers to lousy report cards will be fair game when the Times Square Alliance and the New York Department of Sanitation set up shredders in the Times Square Visitors Center for an hour on Dec. 28.

Recycling bins will be available for items that can't be shredded, like embarrassing fashion mistakes, annoying CDs and irresistible - and fattening - chocolate chip cookies. The organizers say they'll also provide stationery for passers-by to jot down memories they wish would go away.

A grand prize of $250 will be awarded to the person deemed to be most creative in letting go of old baggage.

Better get there by noon: At 1 p.m., a sanitation truck will pick up the distasteful, the disturbing, the downright depressing - and cart it all away.

You can pick your friends...

You can pick your friends but you can't pick your family.

It's true.

i am very annoyed right now. In fact, so annoyed that i can't really write anything else right now. i have to cool down first. i think i'll go soak my head in some ice water.

Can someone call Cthulu for me? Please? i have a job for him..... *evil grin*

Thrifting!

my thrift store treasures today:

A Flight suit for Master that fits oh-so-good for $4.00.

A camo BDU shirt for Master for $4.00



and (drum roll please) a great, real-sheep-skin brown leather bomber
jacket for me for 20 bux. Old, nicely worn and broken in. Super warm.
Needs a bit of repair on a few seams and it's hanging up in the bathroom
soaking up huberd's like a sponge. It's going to be a fine looking coat
in a about a week. Will go well with goggles. Needs a aviator's helmet to go with it....Oh, and a full length black velvet dress for $4.00.



i am happy to report that my title vest is hanging safely in the
closet. i keep peeking at it to make sure it's really there. (yeah, i'm
a dork!) i'm on the couch, having a cup of tea and munching on cookies that my Master made for me.
Lucky girl. Grateful girl!

But it's just a vest....

***i wasn't going to write about this, because i didn't want anyone
else to find out about it. But i think this is an important thing, so
i'm sharing it with you all.***



Well, the weather held out so Master gave the go ahead to get dressed
up and head out to the NYboL bar night. As usual, the boys did a bang
up job and packed the 9th Ave Saloon. There was a delightful Santa to
pose with, Mr Eagle 2008, Peter Schwartz. The cake to celebrate the 2
year anniversary of NYboL was great. We had an amazing time taking to
S. D. which for some reason, we just never get a chance to do. It was
nice to get some time with him. i really like the boy's mind! :-)



So, then.. it's time to leave. Master gathered up our coats. We grabbed
a cab, got back to Master's car and.... hey, why is there only one vest
on the back seat of the car? Yeah, my vest. Missing. my heart sank, my
stomach almost flew out of my throat, but since my throat was closed
and i was hyperventilating, it didn't . A million thoughts ran through
my mind:



i'm an idiot.

Master is going to be so disappointed in me.

i'm in big trouble.

Master Jim and slave marsha and Mark Frasier and Cougar are going to kick my ass.

i'm a bad slave.



i was already planned 2 things: my funeral and how i was going to get
another vest and patch made so no one would ever know what i did. i
know i'm not the only person who's ever misplaced a title vest. In
fact, i have rescued a few myself for other people who put them down in
a bar or at an event. But, let me tell you - when it's YOUR vest, it's
the most agonizing feeling that you've ever had.



Master totally kept His cool, while i became a gibbering lunatic in the passenger seat. i made a few calls to the boys to look
around for it and we drove back to the Saloon. There it was. Just sitting
there all alone. my poor vest. i scooped it up, took some well deserved
ribbing from the boys and we headed home.



Since this incident ended up well in the end, it was a great
opportunity to think about what this hunk of Leather means to me. Since
this one was the result of 2 solid years of preparation, soul
searching, darn hard work - it means a lot to me. As a result of all
the work i put in to myself towards earning the title, i've gotten much
better at speaking my mind, standing up for myself and being very clear
about what my needs and wants are. And making sure that they get met.
It's like it's the skin i grew as i was making this journey and found
my true self. Master and i both get big grins on our faces, still -
almost a year after earning these vests. Every time. They're a part of
our personal history and a part of the community's history.



"But it's just a vest." No. No, it is not.

Fabulous!

Master took me to see I AM LEGEND tonight. Fantastic!

i got a package from a new California friend! i can't wait to have a free moment to sit with a glass of Shiraz, lit some candles and open it. Oh, yes, it's so good to have a fellow member of the V.B. Fan Club! Thanks Daddy George! i love You!

After i cooked up an amazing dinner, but before we left for the movie, i got a LONG phone call that i was waiting for. Plans are made, girl is happy, happy, HAPPY! Did i say i was happy? Oh, Yes. Happy, with a capital "Fuck Yeah!"

Fabulous. Lucky girl. me.

Snow NO!

Ordinarily, i get quite jazzed about snow. i love big blizzards, being
snow bound. Baking bread and making soup in between shoveling. Hot
chocolate, steaming cups of chai and snuggling in my fuzzy socks.
Explaining to the neighbors that "yes, i do wear a skirt while i am
shoveling. No, i do not own any pants. Please go away." Taking the dogs
for long snowy walks. This is the first time in a long time that i have
been so anti-snow.



i REALLY want to go to the NYboL bar night! It's their 2 year
anniversary. i feel like we haven't gotten to spend anywhere near
enough time with the boys. We became associate members and then soon
after, won the International titles... so we've been on the road a lot.
They all did so much for us, hosting our fund raiser before we headed
off the South Plains last year, the NYboL Bootblacks took such darn
good care of us.... i just want to go to the party and be festive, damn
it!



Mrs. Snow, Please hold off until Sunday morning, OK?

Topics for discussion

i thought i'd write somethings down before the meeting for MAsT Central NJ tomorrow. i tend to not be the most spontaneous speaker ever during these meetings, so i figured i'd write my stuff down and share it. Comments are welcome and would be much appreciated! Fire away!

** Does our gender/sexual orientation or identification impact upon our ability to form an M/s relationship?

Personally,
i don't feel that gender has any effect on the ability to form an M/s
relationship. With that being said, if your goal in forming a
relationship is not one of M/s but rather to form a sexual, romantic
partnership than, yes: by all means your gender and orientation will
have an impact on the who and how a relationship is formed.
slaves have gender, SERVICE is genderless.
(Forming a
romantic partnership is a noble and beautiful thing. Just be clear that
that is your goal and stop muddying the waters.What is your intention?
Be clear!)



** Are there problems unique to our individual gender/sexual orientation or identification within such relationships?
The
unique problem that i personally have is trying to separate for myself
and for outsiders the fact that i am a feminist and won't put up with
being treated un-equally or disrespectfully by a man. People on the
outside may see what i do as being a wussy and letting myself be
trampled by "my man" when in fact, Him being a man has nothing to do
with the relationship that we have (in my opinion) He could be a woman
and my *submission* would be the same.


** Are there problems that we regard as universal,
regardless of gender/sexual orientation or identification within such
relationships?
The
universal problems are just that: universal. i have seen just as many
gay male pairs having issues with their biological/adopted children as
het pairs. i've seen just as many het pairs arguing over money issues
as lesbian pairs, etc, etc etc....



** What problems arise within M/s Households where gender/sexual orientation or identification of the participants is mixed?
The
problems that i have seen arising in mixed households is that the
personal sexual needs of individuals might not be getting met in a
timely manner. It's hard to find time to serve a person and at the same
time find time to have an outside boyfriend/girlfriend/fuck buddy, etc.
With that being said, there can be just as many issues with a het pair
or gay pair not getting their needs met or making time for their
additional partners. Play time is play time, it's a great thing but,
time is a finite resource. We all need to *make time* to get our NEEDS
met. Finding balance in all your relationships is about making sure
that your wants/needs/desires are being communicated, understood and
acted upon. If making time to get your needs met means sitting down
with a calendar and scheduling it in - the by all means do it.



** What resistance or obstacles have I, as a GLBT, or het individual encountered within the M/s community?
The main resistance i've experienced:
Because i am married, that my Master is really just my bossy husband.

Because we are male and female, we are perceived as being
heterosexual and monogamous. (which can make getting a date sort of
difficult! *grin*)
Because we are male and female, we couldn't possibly be doing M/s correctly.

However, i think i have, by and large gotten more "resistance" from
het people, in the form of their perception that what Master and i are
doing is a bedroom game, the same as they are playing.
What we do isn't playing. It's our lives.

(i'd
also like to add that the resistance that i have experienced has been
actually very little and mostly from people who i find obnoxious
anyway... so it just makes me laugh...)

** Our community is inclusionary of all such orientations...how can we
better serve and support the diversity represented within our community?
First
of all, i don't believe that most our community IS inclusionary of all
such orientations. At all. (However, i think that that is a separate
topic - i'm not even going to try to tackle that here.... Don't even
get me started on the annoying habit of certain people to de-gender
trans people after they have been repeatedly corrected. Have i ever
made that mistake personally? You bet i have. But when the same
incorrect pronouns roll off the same people's tongues, over and over -
then, to me, it's being done on purpose. As a dig. As spite. *stepping
off my soap box now*)
Secondly:
showing up to other groups events would be a really good start. When
other groups in the community invite each other to their parties, and
meetings - it might be beneficial or at least polite to send a
delegation to the events that they've opened to you. Eventually, if
such invitations are extended and not attended and / or reciprocated,
people get the message that you really aren't interested in learning
about them and supporting them and stop inviting you.

Busy weekend ahead and new eyes....

Very busy weekend ahead - tonight is the Leather Bar Night in Asbury Park.... it'll be so nice to see my Asbury leather family tonight. i love the friendship that i've found there. i wish i could see everyone there more often than i do.

There are also 2 other parties to attend this weekend.

And for the new eyes part: i was talking to someone about what i do for a living and they got all excited. What? i mean, yeah, i can get tons of gloves for sex but... oh, wait... i can get not just the occasional pair of Corcorans but i can get RUBBER boots. You know, thigh high rubber boots. Big crazy respirator masks.... other implements of destruction play.Suddenly, my ho-hum boring catalogs become porn when seen through someone else's eyes. i really like the way this person thinks.
Oh. yes. i. do.
:-)

Fear of a blank page...

i've been having a blast getting work done in my Studio. Master peered in the other night and was looking at *me*, not my work and announced how great i was! ( i was working on a collage at the same time as my embroidery machine was whirring away with a design i'd just digitized.) i started to get nervous - is He judging my work? (Right now, i don't think i even want positive comments because i'm afraid it'll jinx me or make me cocky or ... whatever.) But he said "Nope, it's the look in your eyes, you're glowing. you're happy. I like that!" and then He wandered off in search of some candy.... That was NICE!

i had (probably still have) an intense fear of the blank page. Whether it's a diary/journal or a poetry/journal or an Art/journal... it's always hard to get started. i've tried all kinds of rationalizing to get past that. A few things have helped.

1: i read somewhere - "in Art, as in life, you have to make your first mark" i don't want to live a mark-less life, so i'd better get past this, no?
2: i can, if i chose to, leave the first couple of pages blank. They can become an index of the work that's in the later pages or i can go back to them later and fill them up.
3: i can "get over myself" by taking the book, a box of water colors and just filling the entire book, every page with color - so i have an entire book ready to collage in. (This is my current favorite thing. Watercolors still allow me to write on the pages, if i need to. And i do need to!)

Releasing/letting go of that one tiny piece of Art a few weeks ago seems to have unleashed a flood of creativity in me. (i suppose it helps to have an inadvertent Muse in my life!)

i am still practicing my patience skills in other parts of my life. Apparently i am waiting for the correct combination of work schedules, days off, a lack of cold germs and travel schedules and let's just throw in a conjunction of stars and moon while i'm at it. Oy, really, patience is not my strong suit. (i think i'll just wander around singing a few bars of Carly Simon "anticipation.... anticipation is making me wait" but all i can picture is Heinz Ketchup when i do that!) (did i make you all sing along in your heads? Good!)
OK, back to work at my job so i can earn money for Art supplies....

Spent

Great weekend. Not at all as i was envisioning it, but fabulous none
the less. Saturday was some of the hottest, wettest sex that i've had
in a long time. Say it along with me kids: Hydration is your friend.
Sharing your hydration is also your friend.

Post sex, i wandered in to the studio and got to cleaning. Spent an
hour digging out and throwing away. Then i got to gluing. i LOVE having
those big speakers in there so i can have good music while i'm working.
Made a call at 3:30 and then did some more work. In a fit of... oh, who
knows what, i spilled something on a collage i'd been working on, got
mad, tore it up. Ended up re-assembling it with some old German
newspapers and grommets and some hand sewing (sewing through paper
sucks!) and now i like it even more.



By 6 a.m. i was waiting for the phone to ring, watching the snow... i fell asleep.



Master got me up a few hours later and i ended up having my planned
Core day, which was: Studio time. So, i ended up with almost 24 solid
hours of good work done. Finally got that call i was waiting for. Late,
but still so good.



Right now, i am: sexually satisfied, my fingers are stained with ink
and paint, i'm tired and i'm happy and i am spent, in a really good
way. Things are coming together in ways not expected - like a collage
gone awry, glued back together and seen with new eyes. Things are good.
Very, very good.

Contracts, new cars, racing and Christmas....

So, i am glad that my life is not a race. Things that i want are just outside my grasp, so to speak. "Patience in all things" was the motto i used to mutter to Taybor when we first got him and he'd destroy something. i think i need to go back to muttering that to myself. But really, i am actually enjoying the anticipation and well, i guess i'm enjoying the learning process. *grin* Yes, i am being cryptic. That's what Ladies should be, right?

i've been working on the contract changes that Master and i have been negotiating for the past month. It's nice to be able to eliminate some of the things that just don't need to be in there, because we've both out grown them. Equally nice to add in different clauses for things that *i* might need as i realize that my personal needs are changing and my world might be expanding. All i have to say is, negotiating can sometimes be really hot and fun. i like contract renewal time!

i am digging the heated seats in Master's new car. Hot, toasted slave buns! Yummy! And leather seats? Bliss!

Today we loaded up the Advent calendar with chocolates. i didn't have one as a kid (i wasn't raised in a Christian household) and Master's family didn't do one either. i picked one up a few years ago and Master LOVED the idea of one candy per day to lead up to Christmas. First of all, it's just fun. Secondly, both of us can get through the day without snacking on holiday junk food at work if we keep in mind that we get to have a really good, quality piece of chocolate when we get home. It's nice.

i am blissed out on the couch, enjoying a latte, snoring dogs next to me. Thinking about my date night tonight (porno store, xxx film booths, then the go-go bar and then home to watch whatever we buy at said porno store)

Yeah, it's a good life, i'm glad it's not a race.