Quiet, busy.....

Personally, i think the Holidays have been very quiet here. i mean, we did all the usual - The Aunt, The Other Relatives, etc but somehow i didn't get frenzied this year - which was a very nice change of pace. my Solstice was quiet also, but very, very nice. Master and His Aunt got me some nice kitchen equipment -Knives! Calphalon pots! i feel the urge to chop and saute....

We took both pups over to The Aunt's house and they were... well behaved! By the time we got home, they were unable to keep their eyes open and were like two over tired children at the end of Christmas day... right to bed with them. Master and i got to have a quiet night with cups of tea to settle our over-fed bellies and then we hit the sack also. Nice.

No holiday bonus this year...Wah! Very sad, but a bonus is a gift and not to be expected. However, i did get a nice, very nice raise and a teriffic review. i did get a very unexpected gift from my clients - some of the Ladies there chipped in a got me a lovely business card holder. In the 25 years my company has been taking care of them, no one there has ever given a gift to us. my bosses feel this is a direct reflection of the relationship i've built with them and acknowledge that i saved that part of our business! That, my friends, is better than a bonus! Now, if things go as anticipated and i end up going on the road as part of my job duties this year.... :-)

Some One had a half day today and so He baked some cookies all by Himself {first time solo baking, i might add!} DELICIOUS!

Recap

A recap of the week:
Very busy at work. i spent most of the week getting ready to visit my clients next week. This is my favorite client visit of the year - i get to deliver presents and gift cards and since i really like about 90% of the people i get to visit, i have a blast!
Wednesday was Jury Duty. Blarg! i enjoy doing my civic duty as a Good American, i just wish the process was so awful. my company doesn't pay for jury duty, i am out of vacation days after going to Black Rose and the Court system pays $5.00 per day to serve. i'm sorry, but that amount of money is more of an insult than a help. It's not enough for gas or parking or lunch. Grr... but i wasn't selected for jury and ended up getting out at noon. FREE day!

i ended up going to Target, buying a big shelf unit for the Master's bedroom and re-organizing all His boots and toys. Now easily accessed, neat looking rows of boots (my eye beholds!) and somehow the bedroom seems brighter.
It's a continuation of the decluttering going on here. i also got rid of another bag of clothes and a bag of papers we don't need and a lot of stuff that i ended up looking at and wondering "now, why did i save this?" i was reading a blog on being spiritually stifled by your stuff. It's true. So very true. Whether you go the Feng shui thing or what ever your spiritual practices are, all that "stuff" is just so much spiritual goo that's got to be removed before you can move ahead. Interesting food for thought.

Last night i took Master out to a new restaurant in town. Pretty good food. i would eat there again. Then off to toy shopping for the Argonauts toys for tots drive in Asbury Park tonight. We don't have any kids to buy for so any excuse to shop for toys is always fun.

Listening to Master's old band Sticks and Stones. First off, it was just weird downloading all His music from I-Tunes, Secondly - wow, such good memories about traveling with the band in that big ugly ORANGE VW van. i realized that just about every band the Man has been in has sampled stuff from the movie Blade Runner. Weird.
Waking up each morning to the Black Crowes sing "then she said my name" It just sets the whole tone of my day and makes me feel good. Great song...

hat - check. coat - check

OK, i'm all ready to go outside and watch the shuttle. Nope, launch is scrubbed! Safety first and foremost! Maybe they'll try again tomorrow, maybe Saturday....

Shuttle

For those of you, my faithful readers, on the East Coast of the U.S. - you can view a rare night launch of the Shuttle (assuming the weather cooperates and she gets off the ground!)

Here are the instructions. i don't know if i can see it from where i am, there are a lot of trees and it's only going to be about 10 degrees off the horizon (roughly the width of a clenched fist) But give it a whirl anyway. Thos of you by NY Harbor may have a great view!

Amazing that it only takes 8 minutes from launch (9:35 pm) to get over NYC! Cool! *space nut* that's me!

to Black Rose and back again....

Wow, what a busy weekend! BR was a blast, Master and i had pretty good turn outs for both classes (considering having the first session and the last session) Amazing people in both classes, with great questions. A surprising (to me anyway) amount of people from NJ - hopefully we'll get them out to the NJ or MAsT Metro NY meetings. i was surprised and happy to see a Gentleman in the Sunday class who has been to several of our classes at other events. i really enjoy his questions and feedback and just his energy in general. *Super!*

We got to spend some time with Quality People who we don't get to see often enough. Very nice! Excellent time in the dungeon, i was a bloody mess when all was said and done. That just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. There was some cool/funky/weird energy stuff going on between Master and i. i've done energetic healing before and i'm also "Reiki I" initiated, so that feeling of energy flow is familiar to me. To feel it flowing out from the needles was amazing! Master felt it flowing OUT of me and i felt it flowing IN from Him. Lots to think about after that scene...

Home to the puppies and MUD everywhere! They were frantic to get hugs and puppy love. i spent all day Monday comforting them, tripping over them and feeding them. Between the 2 of them they've eaten 12 cups of food and are still going!! i also spent the day doing 4 loads of laundry. How we wore so many clothes in 4 days i have NO idea! :-)


i'm going to wrap up my evening, finish folding Mount Laundry and go root for Master's fantasy football team! (and beg for a few puffs on His relazation cigar....) G'night.....

Thanksgiving

What a great weekend! So much to be thankful for this year, so many wonderful new experiences, so many good old friends, so many new friends! Even the rotten and uncomfortable parts of the year have lead me to be a stronger woman and have helped me to grow.

Master and i spent the Holiday with NYbOL, it was great to get to know the guys a bit better and the food! OMG! Good Goddess, can those boys cook! What an excellent group of people - good looking, good cooking...how can you go wrong?

Friday, Saturday and Sunday were spent doing some major cleaning, revamping and redecorating in the Household. Master was a huge help and over all great co-ordinator. This is a continuation of all the decluttering going on in our lives. It started in the studio and it's spreading though out the house and in to other parts of my life. It's a nice, lighter feeling for me. i wasn't a big believer in Feng Shui, but i'm starting to see that a lot of it's principals apply to my life. Either way, the holiday tree and lights are up, most of the house is decorated, most of the house is clean and shiney again. i feel great about that, YAY!

We even fit in a great time at Paddles on Friday. An awsome thigh caning, hung Kyle & friends :-) PLUS we got to meet up with the Pride Household - it was great to see those guys. i miss seeing the old gang regularly.

We had a 2nd Thanksgiving meal today. i usually cook a rack of lamb for Master for Thanksgiving so we had that today along with some turkey and butternut squash & apples, Pommes Anna.... now i'm stuffed!

Master gave me permission to register for ARTiscape, which is a 4 day artist's retreat. It's in May, shouldn't conflict with any leather events. So, i picked out my classes and booked my room. The host hotel is the only hotel in the U.S. that's a Botanic Garden - BEAUTIFUL! i left some space in my schedule to walk the grounds and relax. i am so excited to go there! i signed up for all the banquets and parties - very unlike the old me to go anywhere by myself, much less to a dinner or party alone. i am getting to like the stronger me.



i'm headed off to clean up the kitchen and take a much needed bath. But i will leave you all with my favorite Tanksgiving picture this year - Wild Turkeys, caught on security camera, trying to board a NJ Transit Train!

BUSTED!

Exhaustion

my poor Master has been absolutely brutalized at work. The powers that be keep demanding more and more work from fewer and fewer people - all in the name of the all-mighty dollar. Watching Him get up to leave at 4:30 am, to fill in for people who have been down-sized is really breaking my heart.

He works so hard: because He's got that amazing work ethic, because He is an amazing provider, because He wants to be sure that He can provide medical insurance for me in case i have a relapse.
And this Man still goes to the gym every day after work and puts most people to shame with the energy that He gives to His workout. Yes, His workout - the one that He does to make sure that He's in the best shape ever so He can take care of business and take care of me.

Then He comes home and has to do yet more work from home. Then i get snappy at Him that He fell asleep on the couch instead of having conversation with me.... Oy, what a rotten slave i feel like!

All i can do is say "Thank You" and try to do as well at my own job and in the service that i give to Him. Sometimes, and this week is one of those times, what i give to Him just doesn't feel like enough.

So, this has been a rotten 2 weeks for us and i blame the down-sizing of corporate America.

11/17

On 11/17, when i was 15 - i went to see the Circle Jerks, False Prophets and A.O.D. at the Reggae Lounge. (i'd run away from home, for the last time, about a month earlier - escaping from an abusive situation and beginning a cascade of legal events which ended in me having my own apartment by the time i was 16. Which was much less fun than you'd imagine it was!)

i went to the show with a bunch of friends (Sir Larry included) Some how, thru much finagling, i got another friend of mine to hold on to my glasses, asked Sir if He could hold my hand and take me up front to be in the mosh pit... since of course, i could see with out my glasses, i needed an escort.

The rest is history. He stuck with me thru all those freakin' HORRIBLE days in court, while i had to testify against my glaring, threatening family. We've been together ever since. It's been 24 years. We've gone from those crazy punk kids with the crazy hair, to those crazy Metal heads, with the crazy hair, involved with many, many bands along the way, to the crazy Master slave couple - still with the crazy hair.

i couldn't have asked for a better life. i am a damn lucky woman!

MAsT D.C. joint meeting

Tuesday Sir and i presented for MAsT DC, a joint meeting of the Men's & the Pan groups. An uneventful, quick trip to Master Taino's. (great directions!) What a beautiful home, such a gracious host. We were so well taken care of by Master Taino and slave david. What a great dungeon, i wish we'd had the time to play down there. Maybe next time! :-)

A great bunch of people at the meeting, Awesome to see Master J, Master Tallen, Master Wes, slave andew, and many, many others. Excellent questions from them all - the presention hinges on audience participation (as most do!) and the quality of the audience's questions makes the presentation sing. It's interesting that, like life, you get out of a presentation exactly what you put in to it.

Sir and i stayed overnight and then up at 5:30 am to return home to our angry dogs. Taybor and LiLu were happy to see us, i ended up giving them an empty box to tear apart so they could vent their frustrations. Between cardboard destruction, some new toys and a lot of wrestling they were asleep by 10:30 as were Sir and i. i love traveling but nothing beats coming home to my own little bed on the floor, next to Sir's bed where i can hear Him snore.

GMSMA Leather Fest

NYbOL logo In M&M'S! GMSMA leather fest was a blast, we got to spend more quality time with NYbOL - what an awesome bunch of guys. Sir Larry & i ran off to the Leather Man so He could get fitted for some new pants, which we'll pick up on 11/18.

Some how i ended up getting hugged and flung up in the air by one of the NYbOL's..... wel, that made me feel like i was just a tiny girl! :-) Funny!

organized Chaos

So, i've gotten my studio space fairly organized... enough so that if i have a free 15 minutes i can dash in there and do some art or sewing. It's very nice.
i have had 2 problems.... the first one is that my work table is low enough or my dog is tall enough that he can reach my work in progress. Which has resulted in: paint on nose, glue on nose, paper glued to dogs head, various pieces of assemblage art (i.e. anything that has any organic pieces in it) being picked apart & eaten, etc, etc.

The other problem is that things still go missing. It used to be that they were simply buried under the rubble of untamed art supplies and piles of things that had no businesss being in the studio. Now however, things are gone and.. well, i don't know what happened. The most annoying missing thing is my Artist's journal, which had some watercolors and collage in it. Gone. Missing. Doh. It's not that the work was so astonishingly great, it really isn't. And i don't care that it was bad, or not so good (or a sign of my progression, i suppose i should say!) It's the fact that it was a mostly unused Moleskine notebook. Yes, i have a Moleskine fetish. (tribute givers, please keep that in mind..) i really was being good about keeping it with in easy reach so i could just throw it down and do some work immediately.

It's frustrating when things like this hamper my progress. i feel like i can't get out of my own way. Sigh.

blogging guilt....

i hate it when i get behind in my blogging and then... Well, i get overwhelmed. Do i go back and blog all the stuff i missed writing about? Just pick up from where i am now? Then i procrastinate and don't blog at all, a vicious cycle!

Between my last entry and now i served as the Judge's girl for Mr & Ms NJ Leather. That was fun. i got to spend some time with a few of the Judges that i already knew, which was great and also met some new people who were awesome! All the contestants made a great showing and the Winners were Chuck for Mr NJ Leather and boy robi for Ms NJ Leather. i am really proud of both of them. Chuck's had a heck of a year and i am just so proud of him stepping up and entering the contest. boy robi kick butt also and looks damn good in formal wear! :-) i'm sure they'll represent NJ well and do a lot of good work this year.

i set up an ancestor altar this year at Samhain to celebrate the lives of my dearly departed. Samhain wasn't as festive (it is my new year, after all!) as it usually has been for me in the past but instead was more introspective and quiet.

i've spent an unusual amount of time on the road for my clients, things are looking good business wise and i may end up having to travel out of state a few times a month. i'm looking forward to more money because of that but i'd really rather be here in NJ serving at home! Seriously, i try to live simply, more money just adds up to more gadgets and somehow the money, no matter how much there is, finds a way to get spent. i'd rather have more time than have more money.

Master and i presented for DSF on Friday, that went pretty well. Lots of people had questions afterwards. i am starting not to judge the response to the presentation until it's done and we're wandering around... then i count how many people come up to ask questions that they didn't want to air in front of the crowd. Which is fine by me, i know that sometimes i have stuff that's either too personal or perhaps doesn't fit the "theme" of the presentation exactly and i'd rather ask later. Or ask via email It's all fine to me!

In keeping with my big "search and destroy" anti-clutter mission in the studio, Master and i have embarked on either starting or finishing a ton of Household projects that needed doing but have been neglected for quite some time. We installed closet organizers in His bedroom, whihc resulted in a major purge of old crap. There's now plenty of room to actually walk in to the walk in closet AND all Master's leathers are hung in one place.

We finally figured out how to display the fabulous pillows we were given at the M/s conference. With the unruly canines in the house, they couldn't be displayed on the couch or on Master's bed, so i sewed some chain on to the corners and we hung them from the ceiling. Yup, pillow bondage! i love the way they look like that. They make me smile.

That's my update for now, signing off before this becomes tooooo long.

CBGB'S

This weekend CBGB's is finally closing.
i am really very saddened by this, for both the NY music scene and for personal nostalic reasons. When i was a kid, i got 5 bux allowance. That was enough cash to take the bus to the S.I. ferry, get to NYC, walk to the Village, $3.00 to get in to CB's to see the show, with 25 cents left over for the return trip on the ferry.
There would be at least 3 bands on the bill - usually more. i saw some of the most amazing punk and hardcore bands play, from all over the world. i was there every weekend for about 10 years.
It was on the stage there, at my VERY first concert ever that i saw my Master for the first time. Who knew we'd still be together? He played there many, many times with a number of different bands. We made friends with some of the sound men and used to get them to tape concerts off the sound board for us. (where are those tapes now???)
i got my first black eye there, in the mosh pit. (because Sir jumped off the stage and kicked me in the eye.... ahh, the early S.M. blossoming of youth!) i carried Sir and a bunch of friends in the pit on my shoulders (chicken slam!)
i, myself, sang on that stage with one of Sir's bands. So, yeah - CBGB's closing is a very personal thing.
i read that Hilly is going to take everything, including the urinals with him and re-open in Las Vegas. i hope he does it, i really do. It won't be the same (nothing in life ever is, i've discovered) but let it become a huge entity with financial backing and pray that the powers that be stick to the spirit of feeding new music, discovering new bands and keeping some dreams alive.

GMSMA

Tomorrow Sir and i are presenting for GMSMA in NYC. i am pretty excited about this. Some people on the board seemed to have really done a lot of lobbying to get me accepted to the panel. i am blown away by their acceptance of me.

Also, the New York boys of Leather are sending a hoard of boys down to support us! Whoo Hooo! i love those guys! It'll be nice to have those friendly faces in the crowd.

Off to do Sir's boots. Hopefully i'll have enough time to give mine the once over. Why are the slaves boots always lacking a fine shine? (don't answer that, i know the answer... LOL)

Philly & flowers, perfect together

Few things are as gratifying as getting a beautiful array of flowers after doing a presentation for a GREAT and responsive group of people. Man, i love Philly!

(Did i mention i love blogging with my camera phone also?)

**just to flesh out the post: Our hosts were amazing! Great job promoting the presentation, the Darkside was amazing and very accommodating, (i wanna go back there to play!) the table of baked goods and home-made candies were astounding. Dinner at Lord Brick's - delish! i *love* a Master who can cook! :-)
Over all, the day was just perfect. A+

Faithful Readers

To all my faithful readers:

my apologies for not writing for quite some time. i am going through a lot of emotional difficulty and this is not the forum to discuss it in. It's too public a space and the M/s world is just too small. 

my main focus right now is myself and other than that, there's just not a lot to write about. i've concurrently demolished my studio - i figure that throwing out the un-necessary was a good way to make me feel better. It's helped greatly and now having easy access to my materials is making it easier for me to work. Unfortunately, i feel all dried up and uninspired! Ah, well - i'm sure my bliss will come back to me soon. Maybe i'll put up some "Reward: Lost Bliss" signs in the neighborhood. That seems to work well for the return of cats and dogs.

Life is change, is it not? 

42? Yeah? Really?

The celebration continues.... This afternoon, i asked Sir if i could take Him to Cold Stone Creamery for ice cream. When i got home from work He told me that He was emailed a coupon for a free ice cream! LOL! i got off cheap on that suggestion. We both got vanilla bean ice cream. He got white chocolate chips and coconut mixed in, i got roasted almond. Yummy! 

Long weekend

Well, my weekend started on Thursday by taking Master out for His birthday a few days early. We went to dinner at Old Man Rafferty's in New Brunswick and then over to the Tinder Box to get Him a smoking pipe and all the accessories. Great dinner and a fun time at the pipe shop. The manager/owner there is super patient and friendly. He really took a nice amount of time showing us how to pack and light (and keep lit!) the pipe, as well as helping to select some tobacco that Sir would enjoy. Fun! Lots of new stuff for me to maintain now in addition to the cigar humidor. :-)

Master also took me out to buy some new sheets for my bed - somehow all of my sheets have disappeared! Sunday Master took me to MOMA to see the DADA exhibit and we ended up wandering around in the Brasil Day street fair, eating lots of junk food and enjoying the beautiful weather, post tropical storm.

Both dogs have been super cuddly with me. taybor had an incident a few weeks ago where he snapped at me because i was trying to take a bone away from him. i swiftly corrected him and crated him for about a half and hour. Ever since then he's been very clingy - in a good way. Lilu was punished for peeing on my bed and since then, she's also been very clingy. i think i'm finally the pack leader! It's MUCH different working with two dogs as opposed to just one. With one, i can give a command (sit, stay, down, no) and enforce it quickly if it's not done. With 2 dogs, there's the whole dance they need to do with each other over who's going to sit closer to mom or which dog needs to knock the other one over to show they're the dominate one. In the mean time, my orders aren't being followed and chaos ensues. i don't envy the Masters of a multi person household - at all! :-)

All this "cuddling with mom" has resulted in me being pinned to my bed each night, one dog tucked between my legs and one pressed up against my back. That's nice for about 5 minutes before i become claustrophobic and have to get them off of me.

Our travel schedule is firming up and we're going to be VERY busy soon! It's exciting and yet a bit scary at the same time. We knew having the title was going to be a lot of hard work, so it's not surprising. What's scary for me is being so in demand! People want to hear what i have to say? me? ok....... i'm actually looking forward to it all!

Long day

After a long day on the road yesterday - and, yes - the new car was fabulous and trouble free - all i wanted was to climb in to bed. While doing the usual landry, i stripped my bed (i sleep on the floor on a futon, very Japanese) and washed all the sheets, blankets, pillow cases - everything. i was looking so forward to sleeping in a nice fresh, non-dog smelling bed. (yes, the dogs are always sleeping in my bed so it gets a bit...doggy)
i made my bed, had a few minutes of snuggling with Master and then made my way to my nice, fresh bed, fluffy pillows, scented with lavendar, and... a big puddle of dog pee. Damn it! luckily the blankets absorbed it and it didn't soak in to the bed but still! i tried to sleep with just a bathrobe and a duvet cover but got too cold and had to ask permission to move into Master's bed at 2 a.m.

i am so frustrated by LiLu doing this to me. She's super sweet and she doesn't try to dominate me except in this one way. It's maddening. She hasn't done it in months so i thought she was over it. *grumble*

my car! my car!

The dealer just called and my car should be ready by the end of today. They found a nice crispy wire inside....and replaced it. Now, i'm not 100% happy with that explaination. Why did a wire burn up in a brand new car? Who knows? Maybe it's just a fluke. i hope so! Either way, i'm supposed to get her back tonight. Then i have a day to drive it around and the next day i am on the road visiting clients - so if something happens, i'll be stranded miles from home on the Parkway. Not a nice feeling.

Yesterday was the joint meeting with MAsT NYC and MAsT Metro NY. Awesome! Fun! Great presentation by Jim on bootblacking and foot worship. Sir Larry got to be the demo bottom. (oh, the life of my Master is soooo hard) Of course, He only got one boot and one foot done so He's a bit lopsided. i gave Him a foot rub on the other foot last night to balance Him off. We ended up going to bed and actually going to sleep by 9:30 last night. Oh, the elderly.

Saturday we hustled our butts down to the Ms. World Leather contest in Philly. Got some quality hang time with NYbOL members - i really like all of those guys! Awesome peeps! Sir got His head shaved by one of them - fabulous job, i might add. Plus He and said head shaving dude got to pose for some pics for Ray Castro. HOT! i can't wait to see the art that gets generated out of that. *sigh* (she fans herself) Woof! Woof! Woof! and may i be so bold as to add: OINK!
i got to spend some time with some of my favorite people and meet a lot of new people. Lots of great tips shared by present and past title holders on how to manage our title year. Another promise or two of support for our Auction Basket for South Plains. It still astounds me how much other people are willing to share to make sure that we do good and have a good year. This is an awsome community that i am proud to be a part of!

singing about the new car blues....

New car? my new car just broke down. Master is LIVID! OY! This is a rotten feeling, but the police in town were nice and at least this didn't happen on the drive to Ms World tomorrow!

$124 to get towed to the dealer - which our friend who works there gave us back out of his own pocket! Thanks Dude!

Back home from the dealer. Well, it looks like it's not hte battery or the charging system. They hooked up the diagnostic computer to the computer in my car and can't get any reading. The sounds ominous to me..... very sad!

i have a loaner car for the trip tomorrow. Same kind of car but it's the low budget one with a regular engine and power nothing. At least it has a mp3 hookup so we can still take the i-pods for the trip.

Ugh!

Happy Birthday Midori

Today is my niece Midori's birthday. She was born August 18th, 1999. i picked out her name - she's named after our Grandmother. i was there to help "catch" her when she was born, it was one of the most thrilling events of my life! She's an amazing kid.

Somehow, my sister and i have stopped speaking to each other, apparently. She made some life choices that really pissed me off and i told her that they did and ...well, that's that i guess. If her choices hadn't involved me or Sir, then i wouldn't have minded so much. After all, it's her life, she can do what she wants.

i miss my sister and i miss my niece. i'm sad that i've not ever gotten the chance to meet Midori's baby sister.... Maybe someday we'll patch things up and get together.

Happy Birthday Midori!

Bread of all types

After a fabulous weekend, it's been a bread filled week. Bread in the literal sense and bread in the financial sense.

• Friday night the 3 of us went to the county fair where we ate ourselves sick on funnel cake (sort of a bread, no?) Sir won stuffed animals for me and for sparky! Hurray! i love my big strong mole whacking Master! :-)

• Saturday we went to a BBQ and got to see all our Asbury Peeps - which was great and got to hang a bit with Vi and the loverly Baskerville! (That's a great name for a hound!) i ate a chicken sausage on...bread
  

• Sunday we all cleaned my car to get ready to trade it in. Sad, i'm going to miss my little champagne pink car! i've had her for 10 years, she's been through a lot with me. All Sir's bands, toting lots of equipment, driving my beloved Basil dog around, driving to my first Tes fest, driving to this past Tes fest..... Lots of illicit sex..... Yeah, i'm gonna miss this car! While cleaning the car, under the front seat - i found a piece of bread and lots of dollar bills!
  

• Monday Sir picked out my new car. Saturn Ion 3, storm grey, sport package (that means bigger engine!) i signed a lot of papers and promised to give them some bread.
  

• Tuesday Sir and i did a big re-work of the household budget and doled out some bread! i also cleaned up the bread machine and set it up to make a loaf of whole wheat bread for Sir in the morning. mmmmm, fresh baked bread!
  

• Wednesday i got up at 5:30, removed said loaf from the maker, and saw Sir off to work with a slice of still warm, organic whole wheat bread and organic butter!
  

Now, i am waiting patiently for the new car to arrive so we can pick her up on Saturday morning. Exciting!
Taybor's swelling on his neck is resolving itself so perhaps no surgery is needed, that's a relief. OK, back to work for me so i can earn some.... bread.

Picnic

Well, Just as i was finishing my last post - all the men folk of HSL showed up at my office bearing ballons, gifts and a homemade picnic lunch with a homemade cake!

Fabulous! What great weather to eat out on the lawn here and just chill out. It's nice to be cared for and appreciated and get to spend time with those you care about.

i'm now going to try to finish up my work day, hopefully i'll get out early and then we're all heading over the the County Fair to pet the animals and gorge on funnel cake and corn!

What a great day!

Public service announcement

Sir and i celebrate a bunch of anniversaries during the year - two significant ones are the day we 'started dating' November 17 and the wedding anniversary August 8th. Both of those fall during two of the most visible annual meteor showers. (The Perseid and the Leonid) The one this week peaks over the weekend - Luckily at a time when people can stay up late and enjoy the show without being over tired for work the next day! So, get out your lawn chairs and head outside! Here are instructions on how/when/where to view it! Enjoy!

fund fun

What an exhausting week. i hate those weeks that just feel like i have a slow energy leak, energy going everywhere but where it should..... leaking like a sieve i am. Moneky mind my yoga teacher calls it. i call it flying monkeys and also crazy makers....

Sir took me for an awesome anniversary dinner at Arirang - i love watching the chef throw shrimps tails and egg shells in his hat! (yes, i am a little kid!)

Today was spent finalizing a bunch of financial stuff and getting that all squared away so that Sir can take me out to look at this: Saturn Ion. i'm diggin' the storm grey. Or maybe the silver nickle. Or maybe whatever they have on the lot that catches Sir's fancy. OK, so i really want this one..... Not very leather of me! *grin* i think i'll stick to the safe and practical Saturn.

Taybor is hanging in there, still swollen, but not in pain. Maybe the antibiotics are working? i've been trying to get in touch with the adoption agency to see if we can get one of their vets to give us a second opinion on the surgery. Sigh....

Minor battle with some doctors and insurance company today. Exhausting, frustration and deepy saddening for me. i hope i can get some resolution to this soon.

On an energizing note, Sir's taking me to see World Inferno in October at Starland! Whoo Hoo!

draining

Well, after an emotionally draining weekend... a lot of tough relationship issues worked over discussed.... now i had to take my poor Taybor to the vet for some draining of his own. Poor boy either has an abcess OR a blocked salivary gland. He's running a fever, very lethargic and really in a lot of pain. i took him to the vet this morning and they might have to shave his face and neck, knock him out and take some x-rays to figure out what's going on.

(just heard from the vet. They drained what they could but it looks like trauma boy needs to go to a specialist surgeon! Oy! i'm going to go pick him up in a little while and then hit my books and see what i can do for him herbally so avoid surgery. Wish me luck!) i can't wait to see if they shave his face....... :-(

raw fish by the river and dust devils!

Last night after work i headed over to Donaldson Park to meet Sir for dinner. i packed a real china dish and silverware for Him and my dog bowl for me (i always use a dog bowl at home for all my meals) Picked up some chinese food for Him and some sashimi for me (perhaps i should have used a cat bowl for the fish...)

It was about 15 degrees cooler by the Raritan River, beautiful clouds, chirping birds, a few jet skiiers racing up and down the river. Really a nice alfresco event!

We headed home once it started to look like a thunder storm and as we were crossing the highway bridge that overlooks the park - i noticed a huge nasty dust devil in the park, right where we'd been eating! WOW, scary! we got out of there just in time!

Home, we fed our other wants and needs and went to bed happy! :-)

Off to the Leather bar night at Cruisin' tonight. We had to skip last month due to TES Fest, so i haven't seen all my Asbury peeps in a while. i am looking forward to seeing everyone and reconnecting.

pretzle people

Sir and i went back to Yoga last night after about a month off. Wow! i really  missed that class! It was very crowded, which i was surprised at. It's still over a 100 degrees here, i just assumed people would be home in front of a fan, with an ice pack on their heads.....

It was a tough routine last night, but i enjoyed it. i have to say that i really enjoyed when the teacher was going around checking form and she exclaimed loudly "look at that form! this is a perfect Trikonasana! your spine! your spine is perfect!  Which, of course, startled me and i almost fell over on my face. (perfect? i thought there was no perfect or not perfect in Yoga?)

i'm really proud of myself for the progress that i've made recovering from the surgeries, especially the one for the i.v port in my chest which really hampered my flexibility. Plus the steriods i took have a side effect of shortening the tendons so i was really a creaky stiff person for a few years. i love my Yoga!

i'm also really proud of Sir for even trying Yoga. He can be a bit skeptical of anything that seems a bit New Age and perhaps anything that has the potential to make Him look foolish (as in "what if everyone laughs when I fall over during class?") But He's really taken to it and is darn impressive. And we've both found out that no one notices if you fall over in class because they are falling over also. OK, so we get the giggles whenever we see each other fall over, but it's not being malicous or judgemental. It's just funny and Goddess loves laughter!

i am grateful for:

i am grateful for airconditioning.
i am grateful for the person who invented the slurpee.
i am grateful that i don't have to work outside tarring the roads.

i promise i will not complain during the winter when it's 10 degrees out and snowing here. Really -i promise!
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A very nice gentleman emailed me some pictures that he took of Sir and i at the contest. If anyone else out there has any pictures - please get in contact with me. i only have a few that were taken by people we were with and i'd love to have others. Perhaps one where i don't look so frightened by winning! LOL!

As Promised:

As i promised all the people who asked for them, Here is the link to our 2 minute speeches from the M/s Conference. i am honored that so many people said that i touched them with my words. It's mutual - i wouldn't be here with out the encouragement of others and the support of the community. So, i thank you!

Please do check out Sir's essays also. They were written when He was facilitator for MAsT Metro NY. Fun! Insightful! Witty! Enjoy! :-)

Pancakes, insomnia and melted plastic

Sunday - still recovering from my lack of sleep on Friday night/Saturday morning. Made pancakes for Sir and the pups. Here's Taybor begging at the stove. Few things are more pathetic than a 60 lb puppy begging for a pancake! Oy!

i spent most of the day in seclusion in my so-called studio. i did a bit of an overhaul on it, but it still remains the Households junk room. i need to throw away about 3/4 of the things in there. (there's a BIG piece of bondage furniture in there that needs a new home....) Each time i try to dig it out, more and more clutter gets dumped in there. It's a losing battle. After i gave up on cleaning (3 trash bags later) i settled down and had a good 5 hours of melting plastic, using distress inks and paint. i even used my wicked heat gun to get some cool effects on a piece. Not relaxing at all and only somewhat cathartic - but it'll have to do for now.

Sir got me up at 6:00 on Monday, i didn't work in the studio as i hoped to. The thought of doing a big dig out that early just gives me the willies. But i got some tea and quiet time with the dogs - which the 3 of us needed. i'll try again tomorrow morning. Small steps....

Ladies and Gentlemen - World/Inferno

Well, that was one of the best shows i've seen in my life - and i've been to a lot of concerts! i am so proud of Jack and the gang. Jack's matured into a fabulous frontman and not too shabby of a dancer, i might add. :-) Jitterbug, indeed! Their new material was fantastic live and with the addition of a handful of extra musicians the sound was as full and exciting as you'd expect from WIFS. It was pretty amazing to get to see them on their home turf at the end of tour. Welcome home!

Forces conspired against me and kept me hostage dancing & singing loudly up in the balcony all evening, so although he acknowledged that we were there from the stage, i was unable to spend any time with him. Oh, well. Sad - maybe the NEXT time he gets back from a tour of the U.S., i'll get to spend some time with him. Next time, i'll make other, better arrangements. i learned my lesson.

No sleep at all once we got home, i just laid there looking at the ceiling all night. i finally got up put of bed at the ungodly hour of 5:00 am, asked Sir to release me from my slave jammies and then went out and weeded the front yard, had some tea and now i'm off to find some breakfast. Should be a productive day with all this extra time..... i expect i'll be crashing and burning at around noon, fast asleep on the kitchen floor or some other ridiculous place.....

crawling out

i feel as if i am finally crawling out from beneath this past weekend! i don't know if i was fighting off a 'bug' or having post stress exhaustion or the fabulous effects of perimenopause.... what ever it was, i felt like crap!

i feel a bit resuscitated after the "date" last night. Yeah, hot wet dirty sex is a great revival for me. i like sex that's so good that afterwards you need to find orange juice to fix up your blood sugar and your stomach is rumbling... piggy! It was too late to eat last night so today i am feasting on pretty good take out sushi for lunch.

Tonight we are going to see World/Inferno Friendship Society play at the Bowery Ballroom. It'll be good to see Jack and the Gang, triumphantly returning to NYC after the tour of the U.S. and it'll be good to compare scars since Mr. Jack had his appendix out a few weeks ago. (yes, i love scars....)

It feels good to be returing to a normal pace and not reading our presentations 2x every night. i will enjoy the peace while i can before the preparations for South Plains begins!
*********************************************************
For all those people who asked me to publish my two minute speech online - i will be working on some changes to Sir's website this weekend and i'll be putting it up there, somewhere.... (there will be a link on this blog to take you there...)

Northeast Master slave Conference

Well, faithful readers..... It was an exhausting and very rewarding weekend. Sir Larry and i were given the honor of representing the Northeast region as the Northeast Master & slave for 2006. i will write more later - right now it's time to finish unpacking and getting the household fed and the puppies settled down!

Mini van, mini surgery, mini freak out

Let's start with the mini freak out - ok, not a real freak out, but there was a LOT of hysterical giggling and really bad jokes this morning at HSL. We're both starting to get really reved up and excited/nervous about the contest. The contest is going to be fun, everything will be fine - but we needed to blow off some steam and this morning was the time to do it. It was nice to be able to laugh that hard at ourselves and still feel confident that we will do our best over the weekend.

LiLu is feeling super fiesty! The vet told Sir he'd probably have to carry her to the car, but when they brought her out of her cage at the office she was jumping and leaping around. That's my girl - strong and unstoppable! The bad thing is, since she feels pretty good she really doesn't want to stay in her crate! She's been barking non-stop since she came home. i'd love to let her run around, i'm sure she'd be fine - but not until the staples come out of her legs. i ran out to Target to get her a new bed this morning, her old one is fake sheep skin and all the fuzz was sticking to her incision. Not very hygenic.
Taybor is very angry that she's locked up. He pooped and pee'd on the floor as a solidarity protest to get us to release the prisoner this morning. grrr.....
Sir and i went to get the mini van this morning. It's...well, it's a mini van. Not very hip looking but it's got lots of space for all the baskets and it's got great air conditioning - vital during this heat wave we're having.

By the way, when i got my hair cut yesterday - the first thing Randy said was "oh, you went darker" Yeah, predictable!

Off for more packing and to find some lunch...

LiLu's out of surgery!

Lilu is fine! The surgery is done.

All four pins ( 2 in each leg!) have been removed.

Each leg had two large pins and two small pins. Both small pins were broken. (BROKEN??? my little girl plays rough with her big brother!) One of the small pins was not able to be removed all the way because of how it broke off in the bone. The Dr. doesn't feel that will be a problem because the pin is very imbedded in the bone.
No food tonight, just ice chips and antibiotics and pain killers and bed rest for 5 days. Then back to get her staples out in 10 days....i think i'm glad that i'll be at the conference and won't get to see her... i feel so guilty when she has to be confined but she's feeling perky and wants to play!

LiLu off to the vet

Here's a picture of a very unhappy pup! Poor Lilu was circling around me this morning, asking me as only a hungry pup can "why are you feeding my brother? where's my food? how come i can't have any water? why did put down to toilet lid so i can't have a drink?"
She should be up and around tonight if everything goes smoothly. i hope they don't find anything weird in her knees when they open her back up. The pins holding her knee caps in place were purposly left just a bit raised from the bone to facilitate easy removal - they migrate about 25% of the time, so they leave an easy out for situations such as these. i wonder how shaved she'll be? She just grew all her fur back from the last surgery! i wonder if they'll take out just the pin that's bothering her or take them both out?

Anxious dog mother awaiting news from the surgeon.....

Breaking rules

Yeah, yeah: not rules that Sir makes for me... my own personal rules. "Never switch hair colour brands before an event."
Totally Trauma Proof Hair Color  my ass!

i can't wait to get my hair cut tomorrow and Randy will cock his head at me, puzzled, and say "oh, you decided to go for a change? mmmmm... it's kind of... dark. " grumble.....i actually like it, but it's not what i wanted and it's definitely NOT what the box shows.

Lilu goes in for her surgery tomorrow a.m.
my allergies are wiping me out - my tonsils even feel swollen! ACK!

i still need to make time to call my Jack. i've been meaning to call Him back since TES Fest, but whenever i look at the clock it's too late at night to call Him. Damn space-time continuum.... If You're reading this - i will probably call You on Wednesday afternoon!

Busy Busy Busy!

 It's Contest central around here! Last minute wardrobe adjustments - taking in the waist on my "fancy" skirt, last minute belt loop additions to my Uniform skirts so i can wear the leather belt that i earned a while ago, boots are cleaned, leathers are cleaned (still need to clean my vest), busy assembling a triptych type display for the Sailing trip - that's coming out really cool!

i'm sure a million more little things will come up between now and when we leave on Thursday, but i'm trying really hard to make sure that at least dinner time will be sacred and peaceful for us. i'm planning a nice, very healthy dinner for the three of us for Wednesday night - so we can just chill out and be grounded & well nourished before we leave.

That's  it for now, back to the frenzy.....i need to clean the bird cage, clean the turtle tank, iron the hankies, pack my meds, find my glasses....

myspace

i am now staying the hell off of myspace. i following links of people/bands i know and i just kept finding person after person that Sir and i used to be good friends with have died in horrible drunken, drug addled puddles of vomit. The death count of friends who i didn't know had died (because we stopped hangin' with them because they were doing too many drugs, etc) is up to 3.

One the good news front, one person - who called himself Alcohol Bob, who supposedly moved to California to become a clown on t.v. - is now a fairly successful director and producer.

i'll end my looking for old friends on that note and try to stop feeling sad.

shrink wrap

Getting all the baskets ready for the auction. The stuff that is actually in baskets has been shrink wrapped. Who knew i had a mummification for inanimate objects fetish?

Thursday date night started out mundane - going to the mall to buy socks for Sir, we ended up at Barnes & Noble to buy some bed time stories for me and then home....
face slapping arm punching hot dirty piss soaked sex. Ahhh, ya gotta love an uninterrupted Thursday evening.

i'm off to take a bath and then i get to clean all of Sir's leathers in preparation for the contest. (plus the chaps, i love the chaps!)
Tomorrow night i get to do all the boots!

Update

i finally finished updating the last TES fest day.

Poor LiLu had another episode this morning. i am looking forward to getting her to the vet on Tuesday to get that pin taken out of her! $1,800 bux to put it in and only $150 to take it out. Grrrr......
Sir and i got a lot of the auction baskets prettied up and shrink wrapped. my pantry (yes, it's my pantry, kitchen is my domain!) looks like a closet of perversion. Baskets of leather goods, blindfolds, dvd's & videos, liquor and food baskets...... Yummy! Just a few more to finish up, the rest of the goods, art work, etc are being delivered in person to the contest.

my outfit for the onstage needs to be taken in at the waist! Hurrah! i have to get that done by the weekend so we can take some pictures next week. It's crunch time for the Hizzles!

More Good news - my dog is a grenade?

It looks like LiLu Dallas just needs to have her pins pulled out of her knees! Big relief! As far as us going to the conference and leaving her in the dog sitters capable hands - the vet said the timing is perfect. Since she'll be in lock down in her crate for most of the day while we are away, it's exactly what she'll need. Bed rest for dogs!

i do still feel bad for her. She's not limping but she's really subdued right now. Poor girl!

(But i do feel good enough to dance around to the new world/inferno friendship society  cd now!)

Bad things and Good things

Let's start with the bad. Lilu was following me in to the kitchen this morning - not scampering, not jumping around. She suddenly yelped and freaked out. i thought she might have stepped on something or gotten stung by something. But, no - it looks like somethings gone wrong with one of the legs that she had repaired. Unfortunately, i had to crate her and head off since i had a meeting with clients that i could NOT miss because of the time i am taking off for the contest. Ugh! i feel so guilty. She's got a 5pm appointment that Sir is taking her to. Cross your fingers and wish her the best - it's going to suck big time if she's got to have another surgery and we have to leave her with the dog sitter!

The good thing is on the way back from my clients, i got to stop at Vintage Vinyl and pick up the new world/inferno friendship society cd. (It's Sir's old band mates band) Damn is it good! Go! Buy it! Now! i am so freakin' proud of those guys! It was also amazing to pick up the cd and have the cashier say "wow, another one sold" and i got the last one. They sold out by 1pm? Awesome! (i just hope the had more than two in stock)

Now, if only i didn't feel so guilt ridden over leaving my broken puppy home alone, i might dance around listening to the cd..... miserable, terrible puppy mother that i am....

Faith, Hope, Love...

Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

i heard an interview on BBC Radio with a guy (i missed his name) who survived the London subway bombing last year. He was saying (i'm paraphrasing) that going thru this thing and all the rehabilitation to heal his body & spirit was an amazing experience. When else do you get to see the daily milestones of your progress? Those little things that mark the changes in your life? Yesterday, he could not take a shower unassisted. Today he could. Yesterday he had a panic attack, today he didn't.

Going thru the illness that i had, i hated it. But i actually befriended it and i realize now that i gained a lot more from it than i lost. Much more. i gained a voice. i gain freedom from my fear of death. i gained a great teacher, Susun Weed. Getting sick made me leap in to the abyss and ask my husband to be my Master at last. So, i lost my spleen? What's that in the face of losing my fear of death? Not much of a sacrifice. Just a scar.

Sir and i have gone thru some major changes in the past 6 months. It's been hard - some of the hardest stuff we've ever faced. We both made some major mistakes in communication. Hearing that guy on the BBC today made me realize that if we didn't go thru all this crap together, i'd not get the chance to see the magic of each day as we rebuild and reconstruct and reconnect. Everyday, the 3 of us get a chance to build a family the way we  want it to be. Is it easy? Nope, i'm not saying that. Is it fun? Well, some of it is - a lot of it is not. This is giving me the chance to open myself up to the possibilities that the universe has to offer me. It's given me the opportunity to reach out to connect to others, when i would normally would not.

Will i gain a couple more scars? Probably. But i like my scars and my marks and the stories that i have of surviving my past, coming out stronger in the end. We're still at the point where we are still learning the dance steps and can see the little daily things we do for each other to make this work. There's sacrifice on all our parts. i strive to remain with an open heart and put aside my fear.

i'm just starting to see that staircase now.

Updating

i've started updating/fleshing out my TES Fest notes.... i'll try to finish them up tomorrow. i can't believe it's been a week!

Work

Ahh, there's nothing better than having your boss come back from a 10 day vacation ,when he's left you in charge, and having your co-workers tell him what a great job you've done! Fabulous! That made me feel really great!
Then i got a call from my big pharmaceutical client and they reamed me out for a minor mistake that i made. Oops! Nothing like a little shot of humility to smooth out a slave's ego....

4th of July

i was so hoping to get to relax on Tuesday and recover from the weekend. We ended up being as busy as every, returning phone calls, answering emails and putting together the dollar amounts for the auction basket for the Contest. i knew that we had a huge pile of donations and things that the Household had assembled - but i had no idea what the value was. *clears her throat* i am VERY pleased! We've got some very generous friends in this Community!

All i can say is for the people that read this blog, bring your money for the auction!
Yes - there's a weekend sailing trip on the coast of Maine with a fabulous M/s couple, with Amtrak tickets to get you there. Anyone up for some play on a yacht? Make Your slave swab the decks? Walk the plank? :-) The Cane Mutiny? This trip sounds so hot that i want to bid on it!

We're still waiting on a few items that were promised and a few that we haven't been able to pick up yet. That stuff should be done this coming weekend. A few people are bringing their donations to the event. (some HOT original art work!) This is so exciting! It's truly heartening to me to see and feel so much support.

Whenever i start to get worried about the little things that slaves worry about, i try to remember how much love i'm getting from not just my Master but from those around me and that, win or lose - there will be a lot of supportive arms to catch me when i collapse at the end of the contest! ;-)
(Hopefully some of those arms will be wielding pokey things and canes in my direction...)
The Contest countdown continues.....

TES Fest Monday - Last Day....

OK, really - no sleep last night. At all! :-) but i mean that in a good way....

• Dogs running wild - poor puppies are so mad from being in lock down and even when we are home, they've been kept out of the living room so they aren't pouncing on sleeping guests. There's going to be hell to pay when we are finally really home!
  
• TES BBQ - We got to enjoy the bbq. Man was it hot out there! The food was pretty good, but once again: good conversation with friends made it better. i got to speak more to Firefly (i love him!) and Master Jack, always a pleasure to spend time with.
  
• Pony Show - instead of classes, we went to the Pony show! YAY! Ponies! That was fun.
  
• Hanging with friends - more hanging with friends. i really felt like this was almost a vacation, my last hurrah before throwing myself in to the contest preparation frenzy.
  
• A phone call from my past! - i headed in to the bathroom before we were going to gather our class notes and collect ourselves. *ring* it's my cell phone. Who the hell could be calling me? It was my friend Jack, the long lost voice from the past. What an absolute heart stopper it was to hear from Him. Once again, conversation picked up where we left off and He said exactly what i needed to hear. After we spoke briefly and He promised that yes, it was ok for me to call Him anytime i needed help - He said two magic words (which i will not reveal here or probably ever, they're the same ones that Sir uses on me to settle me down and i never told Him about that!) and said good bye. i hung up and burst in to tears in the middle of the parking lot. i was bawling my eyes out, but i felt great. Some people are just such magic!
  
• Some poking of my thigh bruises.... so after i bawled my eyes out i settled down and got my thigh bruises poked by someone. Now i'm really feeling great! :-)
  
• Some flirting with someone else....Went inside to vending and got some awesome bear hugs and some flirting done. my day is just getting better and better.
  
• Our class on Worthy Mastery/Worthy slavery - Well, by 5pm on last day, there's not a lot of wide awake people left. But we had about 10 high quality people in the room, asking great questions and had a very interactive class. i know i certainly ended up be blown away by how well it went.
  
• Great conversation afterwards - met 2 local people and man oh, man - do i love those 2 guys from Texas! - We ended up hanging around for about a half an hour after the class talking with the 2 guys from Texas, who i am madly in love with, and two local people who we are planning on having dinner with after the contest.
  
• Home - clean up, dogs gone wild and happy! - i drove home alone, cranked the stereo (world/inferno again) and drove f*a*s*t, elated, exhilarated and so happy to be home. We three of us, cleaned up the house, played with the pups and ate all the leftovers from Thursday night.
  
• and then...... a few hours later, off to an exhausted and well deserved dreamless sleep.
  

TES Fest Sunday

• What day is it????: woke up with no idea what day it was... still slightly damp and really sore! But a good sore, in all the right places. Plus, why didn't anyone tell me that Tops worked so darn hard? :-)
  
• Sir Stephen & slave catherine's class: Very well attended and Interesting. i don't get to see them present often enough. That's got to change. i love that slave catherine's confidence in public speaking is just through the roof!
  
• Lunch snafu: Far too much confusion on where to eat.....
  
• Our class & schedule confusion: HSL's class on How we changed from Vanilla to M/s - listed in wrong place.. so turn out was small but it was great. Lots of good questions.
  
• Dinner at Java Moon! (Yummy!): i am so diggin' on this place. There's another one near Sir's house so i will be going back again. Comfort food (chicken pot pie and smashed potatoes) totally hit the spot.
  
• Thunder storm & cool lightning: Huge storm on the way there and back. i saw lightning that was sort of circular, like a lasso. That was amazing.
  
• my turn for an ass kicking (ok, thigh caning): back to the dungeon for a thigh caning scene that i requested. stripped to jock, boots and a white tank top. Tied to chair, shirt cut off of me, me resisting all the way. Kicking until my legs were tied to the chair. Amazing how accurately i can spit even with a bone gag in my mouth.... Yum, yum yum...
  
• sadly, not so much flirting today! just a little.... barely enough!
  
• Home
• No sleep..... for many reasons..... many, many reasons....... :-)

Oh - and i forgot, this belongs on Saturday's post - amazing and generous contest support from a favorite vendor! Huzzah! i can't give details until it's firmed up but it looks like rather than a physical donation, we might be getting a % of sales at the M/s Conference for the travel fund!

TES Fest Saturday

• no sleep.....So really, i didn't sleep at all. Just layed there staring at the ceiling. It happens more than i like. But, no reat for the wicked. Up early, dogs crated and off to the Fest for an early morning class.
  
• adversarial play class: Sir and sparky's class. After their...scene? at South Plains, so many people were asking "what the hell was that? A fight? Are you His slave? Do you let Your boy talk to you like that? So many misconceptions on what their relationship was/is and what the play was about. It needed a class to explain it. LOL, standing room only and in fact, some of the people who witnessed it there in Dallas were there for the class! Hot! Lots of explanation, then an explosive 20 minute demo. Two goin shots to Sir, one, two, three rug burns for sparky. Fun. The best thing was so many people coming up throughout the whole weekend telling them "we went back to the hotel and re-enacted your class, we had a blast, thank you" that's very gratifying! Build a better pervert, indeed!
  
• lunch on the run... which building are the classes in? at this point, i can't even remember what we did for lunch....and we could figure out which building the next class was in! Oy
  
• 2 great Lady Catherine classes - One on super deluxe piercing and one on the 3 C's. Both great - i'm not a big fan of piercing. Having an illness that required a lot of blood tests and transfusions and my permanant i.v. port then that freakin' awful and ineffective (for me) WhinRHo chemo stuff - i just am not a big needle girl. HOWEVER - i am working to reclaim that for myself. SO as hard as the class was for me to watch, its part of the work that i need to do to free myself from my medical fears.
  
• quick dinner - unremarkable.
  
• flirting continues.....Good Goddess, if there was any doubt in my mine that i'm a sexual being and basically a slut for the right guy, that doubt has been removed from my mind.
  

• and some hot sweat licking.... damn. That guy is just too hot for my own good. :-)

• the take-down of Sir vrs. sparky and me....what happened? You'll have to check back for details! : Yes, that's right. sparky and i have been planning this for about a month. We let the Man think He was going to beat the hell out of sparky but, well - He hinted that He wanted it... we took a chance and He loved it. Tied up with His own belt, theatened with a stun gun, (He's quite a fighter, my Master is) beaten using His own techniques. Finally beggin to be put in the sling. :-) i went around begging some lube (thank to B & V for locating it for me!) A Man in a sling for the first time is a happy Man! That's my story and i'm stickin' to it! Who knew i could Top? me. i knew.... :-)
  

Home. Hot. Sex. All members of HSL satisfied and sleep deprived. and grinning like a bunch of idiots. The bed sheets are in the wash and all is well.....
headed to the shower and ready for round 3......

TES FEST FRIDAY

i'll be filling this in when i am coherent - probably on Wednesday. But before i forget my notes:

• work: it was awful getting up for work today, knowing that Sir and sparky and our guests were going to TES Fest without me. Luckily, it was really slow and we managed to get all our orders out the door by 3pm - by 3:15 i was parked and ready to rock! Sir greeted me with a huge hug in the parking lot. i love being greeted by that Man - He knows how to make a girl feel wanted! :-) Registration was a snap - very well organized and within a few minutes i was....
  
• bootblacking! OK, i was not bootblacking, but i was the recipiant of a wonderful bootblacking experience by one of our houseguests. She did a great job her 1st time out in a public setting.
  
• old friends new friends: It was great just chilling out by registration and seeing old friends, both local and not so local, as well as reconnecting with new friends. Zoinks! Such hotness! We also ran into a friend of Mistress Blair's that we haven't seen in a couple of years - that boy has grown into a vision of super cute hotness. So innocent looking but yet NOT! :-)
  
• dinner: at a local place where Sir used to eat lunch every week. They (the cute girls behind the counter) were happy to see Him. The food was ok, hanging with friends made it better.
• a great auction! i was looking so forward to bidding on someone - but with the opening bid i was blown completely out of the water. Oh, well. It worked out for the best. He went for a vast amount of money and i'm sure he got a great experience out of it as well. *snicker*
  
• a great beating with eye candy to boot! Off to the dungeon to get flogged, punched and kicked. As Sir was getting me situated, a vision of hotness set up a station directly in my eye shot.... sigh! So i get to be beaten by my super hot Master while looking at another hot guy beat a hot girl? It's just not fair the things i have to suffer though. *sniff* After some teasing back and forth between the two Sadists, Sir got down to business and i settled down to get a much needed thrashing. Then some delightful aftercare - Sir rubbed my hands and shoulders while sparky did my boots! That was great, thanks guys!
  
• home - dog pee on my blankets - again! Back home... the dogs must have been left unattended before they were crated because someone pee'd on my pillow and blankets. i got out a spare pillow (lumpy!) and a blanket and settled in to sleep on the floor as usual.
  
• no sleep........ and the Fest continues: not much sleep, too hyped up and no "release" for me....
  

the ITP anniversary

This weekend marks the anniversary of the i was first diagnosed with ITP - the weird red marks all over my body, the extreme bruising for no reason. The doctor fluffing it off with - "oh, just take some vitamin c, you'll be fine. ok, i'll do a blood test, if you insist. " The crazy phone call the next day to "get my ass in the hospital, now. Don't even go home to get clothes. Just go NOW."

i was so scared, i actually stopped for a cup of really good coffee on the way, figuring if i was about to get a death sentence, i'd do it with one of my pleasures in hand. Sir was SO afraid for me. i remember hearing Him and the Dr. whispering in the hallway about LEUKEMIA. WHAT!!!??? The extremely painful bone marrow biopsy (if anyone wants to see my tiny scar - just ask. i just realized this week that it was still visable) the awful platelet transfusion, which came after a long and scary wait because blood was in short supply over a holiday weekend..... watching fireworks out of my hospital window, hooked up to an i.v. - that was freakin' sad. (oh, not to mention that i started leaking spinal fluid from the biopsy and got really sick from that! Oy!) i wasn't sure that the diagnosis that i got was any better than leukemia, since i'd never heard of the disease before - scary stuff.

SO, here i am many drug therapies and 3 surgeries later. My Hemotologist gave me clearance to go forth and do what ever it is that i do (i was pretty out with him as a pervert) my counts are stable and i feel great. What a long strange trip it's been. If it hadn't been for me getting sick - i wouldn't have petitioned to be Sir's slave Interesting, huh?

i am a lucky, healthy girl!

Pre-TES FEST PARTY!

whoo hoo! Perverts gathering in their masses!
We'll have a house full o' people tonight, (ok, not FULL but 2 extra= 5 total) i am excited. i'm gonna rush home and whip up some:
Baked Ziti, salad, garlic bread, meatballs & sauce and a vietnamese noodle salad for the vegans in the crowd. (ok, i'm not a vegan - i'd just rather eat a cool salad when it's this humid out)

i'm off to lunch and when i return it'll be time for yet another party - ice cream cake farewell party for a retiring co-worker. Huzzah! Huzzah for ice cream cake!

Contact

What a crap week of work! Really! my boss hasn't checked in even once - which i guess is good because he trusts me to run the place without him. Or is it because he knows i'd yell at him about how under staffed we are? Who knows. i'd better get some swag from Italy or i'm going to be really annoyed.

i just mailed a letter to a dear old friend that i lost contact with. He has a way of settling me down with His emails but i think He's gone offline.... UGH! So i sent a real paper letter with a  stamp! i hope He replies. i hope the reason He fell out of contact isn't that His wife didn't like me speaking to Him. Or worse yet, that He really just doesn't want to speak to me!   i really want His opinions on some of the contest stuff, mostly with the emotional crap that i'm worrying about. He generally just tells me to shut up and stop being a goof. Doesn't put up with my nonsense - kind of a verbal face slapping on a hysterical person.  He's a good hearted man who stood by me (along with Sir) while i was going thru all my family's angst  and the family court abuse case and alot of other teen age drama. A good guy, that one.

boo boo

OK, so my pinkie is not broke, just squashed but my nail was ripped off and that really still hurts a lot! i hate non-consensual pain!

Spent many hours cleaning the house with Sir. It probably would have gone faster if the dogs didn't need to help. Every time we'd sweep up a pile of dust, they'd have to rummage thru it and look for goodies..... But the house looks great now. i love cleaning with my Master - we're crankin' tunes, i strip down and scrub the house while i'm shakin' my booty!

There's really only 2 days of work left until the weekend. i just have to get past tomorrow and Thursday. For Friday, i suggested to the warehouse manager that she get all the UPS & Fedex pickups as early as possible so we can blowout of there. Not surprisingly, she agreed. (i love being in charge sometimes.) i'm pretty well "out" with her, she knows i'm in to leather, etc. She also knows that TES Fest is this weekend and why i want to get there ASAP. She knows i'm up to no good this weekend! :-)

i'm going to go collapse and enjoy the sparkling house and contemplate a devious take down scene for the weekend. i need to put my head together with my co-conspirator and figure out some logistics..... be careful what You hint around about - You just might get it!

nothing like....

There's nothing like returning to work after a fantastic weekend and having a real turd of a day! At least i had the pleasure of being uncomfortable where ever i sat down AND i kept banging my bruised thigh on my desk. Ah, the gift that keeps on giving! *grin*

i just realized that the dead line for ordering Sir's work anniversary gift was closing in today - He handed me the catalog a few weeks ago and said "hey,  you can pick out anything you like from this catalog, the company's giving me a 10 year anniversary gift... by the way, I like the smoker/grill" So i just ordered  it up. Should be here in a few weeks. i am a total BBQ fanatic, when i have enough time to do it right.  48 hour marinades, 24 hour dry rubs on the ribs. Oh, yeah! (ok, so i don't eat red meat but i can live vicariously) i've only gotten to grill once this year and it wasn't so good. i have a feeling that that might have been the last time for this summer since we're going to be so darn busy!

ok, lilu just jumped on me, ripped off my pinkie nail and i think she broke my pinkie. signing off now......

Pride

And then it rained again! Sunday, up early.... quick breakfast and then i was FINALLY allowed to take a shower. Yeah, i needed that! :-) Quick ride in to the city...great lunch-freshly made potato chips with my sandwich, yum! (that's what the hip kids say now a days)

Tons of fun under the grey skies. A bit of play with my new playmate - i do like single tails, i do, i do! i like my life! i am a very, very lucky girl! (oink!)

It took forever to figure out where to get the train back to the car, but the trip home was fast. Great conversation on the Household, expectations, wishes.... Yeah, all great stuff. i repeat - i am a very, very lucky girl.
A hot bath, foot massages all around and off to bed soon. i'm gonna sleep like a happy piglet. 

Rainy days and Saturdays get me....

OK, So little Miss me - afraid to travel alone.... Headed out in the monsoon on Saturday a.m. Got to the ferry after much delay and drenching. Wow, did they ever change the ferry terminal since i was last there. Mom's ashes in hand, i stood outside and waited for the right moment. A lack of cops and onlookers, plus i really wanted to let her go when we passed the Statue of Liberty - since she' s the closest thing we've got to a Goddess in the harbor. Here's a picture of the salt shaker that my sister put my share of my Mom's ashes in. Yes, it's got a picture of a cock on it. (ok, Rooster if you insist)
i gave it some thought, i wished we'd gotten along. i wish her life wasn't so damn hard for her. i wish my father wasn't such a bastard to her. But i'm grateful that she made me the person that i am - a damn strong and damn capable woman. And then i let her go ..... Plop. She floated until that little shaker was out of sight. i feel much lighter now. She was a heavy burden to carry.

Got in to NYC, met up with a new friend and a newer friend. Got a great lunch, learned some stuff about my self that i already suspected and generally surprised myself. Several great hours later, i was in a cab and then back on the ferry - grinning like an idiot. Thank Goddess they sell orange juice on the ferry!

i drove home and went past the house where i grew up - the Pine trees that were planted when i was born are literally over the rooftop. Weird. Cool. The Japanese Maple that my mother grew from a seed that she brought with her when she moved here is just gigantic. That made me 15 minutes later than i should have been home, but all was forgiven. i came in to the house to see two fabulously happy people who greeted me with my favorite treat from Rita's (vanilla custard and mango Italian ice!) and a welcome home note on the door. The intrepid traveler returns!

i like rainy Saturdays. Can't wait for my next voyage.

The crack of Morning

Crunch Crunch *opens one eye* What's that noise? .... silence.....

Crunch Crunch *opens one eye* TAYBOR!!!!!!

Taybor stole Kyra out of my bed and ate one of her eyes. (Kyra, which means "ladylike" in greek is my stuffed rhino) The litle girl in me is severly traumatized! The eye is gone, no hope of reattachement. i'll have to make her an eye patch. Very sad and very angry. Sir just got Kyra for me a few weeks ago when i was really sad and having a tough time.

Plus, someone pee'd on my blanket again! Damn it! i think i'm going to rig up something with Sir's Folsom box that shock the pee-er when they do that. There's got to be a way.

Ok, gruel for breakfast and off to the gym... then off to ride the SI ferry and when... who knows? :-)

What to do?

Still trying to put together my "slave barb does NYC alone" day for Saturday. i'm not happy with any of the things that i've selected. The Circle Line? The Bodies exhibit at South Street Seaport?

Maybe just stomp around my old digs on SI, visit my old High School wander the grounds of Snug Harbor where i used to hang with my best buds (friends forever, we'll never be apart... haven't seen nor heard from in ..oh, 20+ years) But the thought of that is just too bitter.

Back when my mother died (Sept 1999) i didn't go to see her in the hospital. That we had a hatred filled relationship is an understatement, but i loved her like... a mother. She truly was the strongest woman physically and emotionally (by that i mean she was like a volcano of rage) My little sister and older brother had her cremated. My sister in a fit of perversity, split the ashes into my mom's salt & pepper shaker collection and distributed it to the siblings - since we all hated each other and couldn't/wouldn't share custody of her. i didn't want this piece of my dead mother. What the hell was i going to do with it? i've been trying to figure out how to get rid of it without being disrespectful, maybe i'll give her to the NY Harbor... there's along story about why i'd leave her in that particular place. It seems fitting to do it but i'm not explaining that here. Now.

Yes, perhaps releasing my mother to the deep blue to swim with the fishies, ride the ferry, hike up to the Seaport and then look at a bunch of dead bodies. How very Goth of me. :-)
Sounds like a plan to me!

testing and boots

i am testing out a new Firefox extention so i can blog from my browser window... should lead to more spontaneous blogging from work - if it works!

Sir just had me look up some pricing at work on a pair of boots. Boot Whore that He is, He needs something else for work.
He already has these
and these:

and these:

But now He needs these:

i have such a great job - Boots are just a side business here, it's a good thing they don't actually stock all of these in our warehouse or i'd really get nothing done. It was bad enough when we had one pallet of Corc's come and i was outside sniffing the cartons. So many boots.....*shiver*

So much for Yoga

Yes, Yes.... we started out having a discussion and ended up being over come on the sofa - so to speak. i do so love when Sir takes me shopping at Babeland. Plus some other stuff came in the mail today that apparently got Him all hot and bothered. :-)

So i made us late for Yoga and before we knew it, it was 8:30. (Yoga started at 8)

What a way to celebrate the Solstice! Happy Solstice to All!

Whacking off

Ok, so i'm enjoying the early morning wake up i've been trying to do. i've been about 60% successful in getting up when Sir does. i wasn't in the head space to follow through for part of last week, but today i was up early. Got a hot porno photo from Sir to my cell phone, which lead to hot phone sex with me, Sir and my Hitachi.... And then - Lilu hopped up on the bed and pee'd all over the blankets. Talk about a buzz kill (pun intended)
So, instead of the highly productive morning i was anticipating - i was washing the sheets and blankets for Sir's bed. Grumble. Maybe Lilu's thinking - "OH, barb's having sex by herself, usually the big dude pees on her... Maybe i need to help out here." Perhaps she really was trying to be a helpful dog. She really did look contrite - even as she was doing it. Sigh.

Off to Yoga tonight. Yay! i need it bad, my hips are all out of whack from standing so long this weekend. Tomorrow is dinner in the park and then i get to do Sir's boots - i hope the weather holds out and we don't have one of those typical NJ summer thunder storms at sunset. i really want to do His boots outside. :-)

Still putting together my itinerary for my solo day in the city on Saturday. slave barb does Manhattan - maybe i'll run in to some charming person or people to keep me entertained. :-)

Leather Pride Weekend

This weekend some one who i didn't know was a reader of mine commented that i don't journal often enough! Well, i'll try to do better - You know who you are! (if my faithful readers would leave a comment now and then, maybe i'd be more inspired...)

It was a really tough week for me leading up to LP. Lots of emotional stuff to work though. i'm proud to say the HSL is a bunch of tough mother fuckers, willing to do the hard work and dig deep. i'm proud of us all!

When we left for LPN, my heart just wasn't in it, but i ended up having a decent time at LPN and a blast at Folsom. On Monday Sir took me to Gunnison Beach where i had a great naked time and got sun burn in places that i never have before! After going there, i can't understand why anyone WOULDN'T want to go there - so much more comfortable and no sand chafing in the swimsuit. A perfect relaxing day - except for the biting flies (which bit me in places i've never had bites before!) i hope we can go back maybe in September, before it gets cold out but after the crowds of people think beach season is over.

Over all wrap up for the week - Hard work, Lots of flirting with someone :-) Hot leather Men and Women and Girls and Boys, a little sunburn, a few bug bites, some major relaxation and Oh, yes, a HUGE weight lifted of my shoulders. i am a lucky girl!

This Morning

*rustle rustle* open one eye... What's that noise? Oh NO! ... And before i can cringe one of the dogs jumped off the bed and right on to my calf. Ever been punched in the calf while you're sleeping? No? Well, good - for your sake, i hope you keep it that way. Let's not forget how big these dog feet are!
It hurt so bad that i was up and awake at 5:30, wandering the house , naked but for my slave jammies. i made a cup of tea and did some reading... Sir got up a bit later and released me and then i started on my day. (After we had some sexy morning activities)
What did i do before i went to work?
Let's see... i finished a purse that i've been working on for weeks. i made a kickin' batch of vegan mac & cheese, which i had for lunch and it was very yummy. i rescued a baby praying mantis from the hot stove (again! He keeps coming in the house and i keep putting him back in the front yard.) i cleaned and organized the kitchen blackboard/message center. Had phone sex with Sir - twice. :-)

i've decided that i need to commit to getting up early. i complain that i don't have time to get stuff done and... Well, maybe the only way there'll be enough hours in the day is if i get up at 5:30 am. (it seems to work for slave catherine, so i MUST give it a try) i'd like to start working on the Book Of Hours that i have. (don't worry, it's Pagan. No that i have anything against following a Catholic one, i just don't want my faithful readers to think that i've gone over to the 'other side! *grin*) i have never been an early riser - i wonder if my mother would have told me that i slept thru the night and well in to the morning even as a baby? This is going to be tough but infinitely worth it.
Another plus side was that there was no puppy wrangling when i left for work - they were so tired from running around for almost three extra hours that they happily went to their crates for some breakfast and a nap. Nice!
my calf still hurts!

Sir sent me these beautiful flowers today at work. Funny how everyone asks: Is it your birthday? Anniversary? No and No.... Then they ask Did you guys have a fight? No. The next thing out of everyone's mouth is "uh oh! He must have done something wrong!"

Why can't the Man send me flowers? Like His card to me said "Because I wanted to."

i haven't done anything 'wrong' when i sneak little treats (pocky, bottle caps candy and sometimes a toy or two) into His brief case. And i don't think anyone thinks it's weird if a woman does that for "her Man."

i'm going to stop worrying what other people think and just enjoy the spicy smell of these beautiful mums!

date night???

Sir took me out for 'date night' tonight. We went out for pizza (a rarity for me) i got 'grandma pizza' which was basically pizza margarita - very fresh mozzarella cheese! Bravo!
Then we scuttled over to Cold Stone Creamery for some amazing ice cream. Sir got cake batter flavored ice cream with white chocolate chips, coconut and rainbow sprinkles mixed in. i got cinnamon ice cream with heath bar mixed in. Those girls mixing the ice cream in by hand are going to have arms like fiddler crabs by the end of the summer.
The ice cream was so rich that neither of us could finish ours (and we only got mediums!) so, they're stored in the freezer waiting for tomorrow after work. (or my breakfast...)
Then, some post ice cream sex and we got busy writing anther presentation. Relaxing and creamy evening.
The dog are both hiding out since we're having a huge thunderstorm here. Tay keeps hiding under my skirt. That might work better if he wasn't 65 lbs! Sigh! big baby!

Dog pee

OK - faithful readers:
i have a dilema here. Someone has peed in my bed two nights in a row. SIr says it wasn't Him and i know it wasn't me....so that leaves the two other free roaming critters, LiLu and Taybor. (i'm fairly sure it's LiLu whose doing it.)

Does anyone have any tips or ideas as to why they are peeing in my bed? Sir says that they're trying to dominate me. Baz used to pee in my bed if he was angry - i.e. if he'd been punished for something or he'd do it after we came back from a trip, kind of a "Ha, welcome home you traitors" kind of way. These two have nothing to be pissed off at.

So, i am off to wash all my bedding... again. i think i'm going to have to start rolling up my futon each day, which is really a pain since i used western style blankets. There's a lot to reassemble before sleep. And it's darn heavy to move around.

Crap.

It's all happening at the Zoo

HSL went to the Bronx Zoo on Saturday! Fun times, great weather, not too crowded and lots of baby animals. Here's a picture of a non-baby animal, a beautiful Silver back Gorilla. Awesome!








And a Poison Arrow Frog. (i'm sorry, but i just want to put it in my mouth - he looks delicious....)














And some butterflies posing for me in the butterfly house....(ok, the first one is actually a moth)

Work

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

What a work week! Good Grief! i'm to the point where i am going to have to literally take a hand truck load of paperwork to my boss tomorrow and ask him to prioritize it for me. What do you want done first? This pile or that one? Or maybe this third one? Argh!

We have this running joke when we are over worked that we should stick a broom up our asses so we can sweep as we run around like chickens with our heads cut off. It used to be funny. It's not so amusing any more.

Next week i have an all day training, plus getting ready to visit my clients - on top of this new, crazy work load that's suddenly appeared. i need a day off.

On the bright side, i just got 6 yards of fabulous camo material to make skirts n stuff. Now if only i had time to work on that......

Where's that darn Yoga mat?

Hastily assembling my yoga mat collection. Do you think i've ever used them for actual yoga? Nope....i have the DVD's and VHS tapes.....The props and the straps... Even some yoga pants and a yoga zone tank top. Unused.
Where's my yoga mat now? It's under my bed on the floor, being used for it's non-skid capabilities to keep my bed from sliding out the door on the laminate floor. i have to pull it out from there tonight since Sir and i are off to a class tonight.
i've been begging to go to a class together for... Well, let's not discuss that - let's just say it's been a long time. i think Sir will be a natural with it - as He is with all physical activities.
i'm not worried about keeping up with Him - it's a non-competitive sport, after all. But before i got sick i was super flexible in a 'look, i can put my feet behind my ears' kind of way. The steroids i had to take shorten the tendons so all my flexibility took a long trip to the Land of Things that Were Long Ago. i was also about 30 pounds lighter pre-steroids. i'm afraid i'll be disappointed with myself and get bummed out about how much flexibility i've lost. But i have to keep being positive. i lost a lot of strength too, but i've worked up to the point where i am now stronger than before i got sick. i just have to be persistent and i'm sure i'll be successful.
Remember my motto as i tell the dog "Patience in all things!" and away i go......

she's making a list, she's checking it twice....

Saturday Sir is taking me for our annual pilgrimage to Mitsuwa market. i'd love to go there more often, but believe me - i'm grateful to get to go even once a year. i've heard thru the grapevine that they've remodeled the food court, so i'm looking forward to checking out the new restaurants. i'm frantically making lists of what to buy so i don't forget to pick up some vital culinary necessity! (Gohan, ume, hijiki, daikon....barley tea.....Kewpie Mayo!)

It's practically 'slave barb celebrates her Japanese Heritage' week around here. First we went to the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens to the Sakura Matsuri. i also bought a set of Koinobori, traditional Carp shaped flags to celebrate Children's Day on May 5th. Yes, yes - i'm celebrating my inner Japanese child who was never celebrated when she was a kid. It's a re-claiming of sorts.
(the father 'fish' in the set is usually black - so Sir can "flag" black carp on Friday! i will be the red carp....the fisting fish?)

my father(Norwegian-American) didn't let my mother (Japanese) teach us any of the language or cook any of the foods. He was a pretty weird dude, if you ask me. Why marry a Japanese lady and then deny her heritage? i understand now that i'm a adult why she was so miserable and angry when i was growing up. Not an excuse for her violence, but at least i know why it happened.

She would only put her foot down at New Year's when she insisted that we have O-Mochi. Yum! If you were to mention mochi to me or my siblings, we would probably all still drool. :-)

Saturday we're off to Mitsuwa, where we'll both feast on good things in the food court and i will wander around feeling inadequate that i can't read any of the packages and guessing what the contents are on some items. Sigh... it's annoying but i try to look at it as an adventure. Maybe i'll get brave and try to eat some natto.....maybe not! (people either love it or say it's like snot. Yummy. Snot.Hmmm.)